Worst Jokes Ever
How do you drown a blonde? You tape a mirror to the bottom of a 13-foot deep pool.
What do you call a smart egg? An egghead.
That was an egg-cellent joke!
I like my cigars like I like my women:
Seven years old coming from Cuba in a burlap sack.
What was the Roman Empire cut in half by?
A pair of Caesars.
I like my women like a day: 24 year olds. 24 hours of fun.
Have you ever said no? Did they keep going?
kys
What is the difference between a school bully and a feminist?
The school bully does not hide behind their computer screen.
In my house, good sex sounds like seals slapping each other.
Santa gives a boy a bike and a soccer ball for Christmas. This upsets the boy. Why?
Answer: He has no legs. The boy has no legs.
What does Michael Jackson and a Playstation have in common?
They're both made of plastic and children turn them on.
There's nothing more depressing than a failed suicide attempt.
Asshole.
I saw a person raping a woman in an alleyway. I decided to help...she doesn't stand a chance between us.
My friend asked me:
Friend: "How much is your body worth?"
Me: "1 million."
Friend: "1 million dollars?!"
Me: "No. 1 million kilograms."
Friend: "Oh."
So my ex invited me to dinner with her new boyfriend.
Her boyfriend said "Hi."
I said, "Knife to meet you!"
Steven Hawking said there is no God,
Then God said there is no Steven Hawking.
What's longer than a penis?
About anything.
Hippity hoppity, women are property!
Yo mama so stupid... She tried to climb...
Mountain Dew!