Worst Jokes Ever

Him: I work with animals all day.

Her: Awwww what do you do?

Him: I'm a pornstar.

How do you make a handkerchief dance?

You put a little boogie in it.

What's the difference between a boy and gold?

More people want gold.

Yo mama so stupid that when she went to see Fast and Furious 8, she was bringing her car to the theater.

My dad is like the female wage gap: nonexistent.

Sans: I like eating ketchup, don't believe me? It's ASRIEL as it gets!

UT Sans to UT pap: You FORGHETTIE the spaghetti!!!

Ink sans: umm lust? That's INKAPPROPRIATE!

Fell sans: I hate these double standards...if you burn a body at a crematorium you're doing "a good job," do it at home and your "destroying evidence."

Error sans: Every time you make a typo, the errorists win.

What do you call a sleeping bull? A bull dozer.

My dad told me I'm a failure.

I failed a math test.

Good thing there's a pole outside my house.

What's the difference between Mark Zuckerberg and a lizard?

There is no difference.

What’s the difference between a bullet and a prostitute? They both burst a barrel.

Breaking News! A plane crashes into a bridge.

"If all of these structures break we will all die."

And I said, "Hey, that is not supportive!"

And he said, "It would be breaking news."

What's the difference between a noodle and a scaboodle fladooodle?

What happens when two walls meet?

They are cornered.

Wanna hear a joke?

Woman's rights.

What's 10 inches and makes women scream?

Cot death!

What did Sally say when she was stuck in the water with kelp?

"I need kelp! KELPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP"

The teacher asked, "Why are you in school on a Saturday?"

I told her my mum told me to go to hell.

weixian

When your girl is sucking your dick and chokes on it, not because it’s big but because you haven’t washed it in weeks.