Worst Jokes Ever
My uncle got sued from NASA the other day. He claimed to be the first one to enter Uranus.
Why did Paul Walker drown?
Because he was too busy carpooling.
What's the difference between my dad and my stepdad?
My stepdad beat my ass before he left.
So today an old lady asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her... Hhah.
What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable?
The wheelchair.
How many times does 42 go into 9?
Get in the van to find out.
My sister got in a car crash a couple days ago. When she got to the hospital, the doctor told her that she needed to get metal mechanics in her leg.
She got really scared and yelled at the doctor, telling them that, “I will not get those implanted in my leg.” I guess she just doesn’t associate with knee gears.
My dick said that your ass is having a boner.
Your daddy must be a drug dealer, because you're dope.
You really gay. No questions added.
Q. You know what really bugs me?
A. Insect puns.
Why are birds good at social media?
Because they "tweet" all the time!?
I guess this is pretty plane.
I am sorry I am just winging it.
Wow, I guess these jokes haven't taken off.
Wow, I just landed that one!
What did the mechanic say to the other mechanic when he broke the car?
"How will we wrench ourselves out of this?"
I was wondering why the frisbee was getting bigger, then it hit me.
I made a joke about unemployed people. It didn’t work.
what's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? the trampoline doesn't cave in when i jump on it.
I was in Alabama last year. I walked into a store and noticed a couple kissing each other, and I said, "Excuse me, where is the bathroom?" The man said, "Right over there." I went into the bathroom and then heard the girl say, "Dad, I have to go to school soon."
Yeoooo.
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