Worst Jokes Ever
If you ever get mad at an orphan, punch them in the face... What are they going to do, tell their parents?
Do you wanna know why orphans don’t play baseball?
They don’t know what home is.
A mom and her son are taking a walk when they pass a homeless man fapping. The boy asks, "What is that man doing?" The mom says, "Making pizza," trying to turn him away.
The son sees a dog fucking another dog and he asks the same thing. She says, "Making extra cheese." When they pass a window and see a couple doing it, he asks the same thing. She says, "Ordering the pizza."
Later that day, the mother says to the father, "I think I want to order some pizza with extra cheese tonight, don't know why that sounds good."
So that night, the husband who was watching tv yelled up the stairs, "Wanna order some pizza!?"
The mother replied, "DON'T WORRY I'M MAKING SOME!"
The son's voice followed, "I'M ADDING EXTRA CHEESE!"
Best friend: Dude, your sister is hot, I'd hit that.
Me: Already did. SWEET HOME ALABAMA
Just a joke: When Stephen Hawking fell over and hurt his leg, his dad said, "It'll get better, just walk it off!"
The chicken is actually a fruit because it is grown on a pole-tree.
Do you know what I found in my letter soup?
A space.
Why didn't the skeleton go to the party?
Because he had no body to go with!
What does a cow sound like when in a horror house?
Moo mooo moooooooo (screaming)!
I keep getting ads about belly fat.
What’s a Mexican person’s favorite spot?
Cross country. 😉
My son always said he wanted to skydive, so we went on a plane, and mid-flight, we had to jump out. The only issue is we were on a commercial flight to Arizona.
Why is a tomato red?
Because it saw the ranch dressing!
What do butts say?
"Help me, I'm getting wiped clean!"
If you ever get bored, just punch an orphan. I mean, what are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
What kind of fish knows math?
An anglerfish LOL
What's the last thing that went through John F Kennedy's head?
A bullet.
Me: Hey you trashy pig woman, go in the toilet or lay on the grass where you belong.
Trashy pig woman: Why?
Me: Because you smell like fart and you're pretty much just a turd with lips.
Me: "Hey, you trashy pig woman, go in the toilet or lay on the grass where you belong."
Trashy pig woman: "Why?"
Because you smell like fart, and you're pretty much just a turd with lips.
What happened when the American broke his arm?
He went broke.