What does a cow watch?
MooTube.
When you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Q: Where does a one-legged waitress work?
A: IHOP.
Roses are red.
Violets are blue.
Once I'm done choking you,
You will be too.
What are clowns good at?
Have you ever heard of Jane Doe? Well, her husband's name is Dill, so I guess that makes him a dildo!
What do people often say in a cold Mexican kitchen?
Brrrrrrito!
I walked into the kitchen and saw my wife chopping up onions, which made me cry.
Onions was a good dog.
What would Martin Luther King be if he was white? Alive.
FRIEND: Hey, want to come to my house?
LONELY ORPHAN/TRUMP: Want to come to my orphange?
FRIEND: Dude, I'm blocking you!
LONELY ORPHAN: :(
Tell a dark joke to an orphan, then hit them. They'll get the punchline right away.
What is the difference between a flat tire bicycle and a woman?
Answer: You need to pump the tire on the bicycle before you ride it, while a woman you need to ride her and pump.
Why do musicians in New Orleans smell so good?
Because they're jasmine (jazz men)!
I play Fortnite, but also I play Minecraft for 14 nights.
Your joke: you.
I am like currency; people always trade me out for someone better.
What would an orphan ask for Christmas?
"A someone."
In the new Grinch, the Whos would say he stole Christmas, "Get him!" Then the Grinch said, "I'm an orphan!" That changes everything. The Whos said, "What would they do if Max was an orphan?"
What's the difference between a bus full of children and a fish?
The fish can swim.
Boy Scout...
- A kid who dressed like an idiot.
- An idiot who dressed like a kid.
