Worst Jokes Ever
I was going to log a pun about trees, but you wooden understand it.
I was playing baseball with orphans, but when they hit a homerun, they had nowhere to go.
My dad, unfortunately, passed away when we couldn’t remember his blood type...
His last words to us were, “Be positive!”
Why are Democrats represented by the donkey? Because some Democrats can be such an ass!
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't run home.
What's the difference between my wife and a battery? I can't use a battery when it dies.
Your kid is so annoying, he makes his Happy Meal cry.
"Number 15: Burger King foot lettuce. The last thing you want in your Burger King burger is someone's foot fungus, but as it turns out, that might be what you get."
What do doctors say to patients who blow wind backwards?
DON'T PUT THE FART BEFORE THE FORCE!!
Have you ever noticed when a woman is pregnant, all her friends touch her stomach and say "congrats," but none of them touch the man's penis and say "well done?"
Me: I’m gonna smite the life out of you!!!
Orphan: What! No! Please no!
Me: What you gonna do? Run home and tell your parents? Wait, I forgot, you don’t have a home or parents!!!!
Why didn't the orange go to the doctor?
Because he had vitamin C.
You must have a good power supply, because you're easy to turn on!
I don't think I'm allergic to this.
Why doesn't Barbie ever get pregnant? Because Ken comes in a different box!
A duck walks into a bar. The duck says to the bartender, "Hey bartender, got any bread?" The bartender says, "No." Then the duck says, "Hey bartender, got any bread?" The bartender says, "NO!" The duck says, "Hey bartender, got any bread?" The bartender says, "No, and if you say that one more time I will nail your bill to this bar!" The duck says, "Hey bartender, got any nails?" The bartender says, "No." The duck says, "Well then, bartender, got any bread?"
What was I saying again?
When you have sex with a coworker but remember it's a family business.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't find home.
Hey, wanna hear a construction joke?
Other person: Yes.
Sorry, I'm still working on it! 😅