Worst Jokes Ever
My ex died today.
I also lost my job as a butcher.
How do you fit a baby in a glass?
A blender.
How do you get it out?
Explosives!
What do you call one baby in ten trashcans?
Chopped Junior!
"Most Deadly Sport"
Playing chicken with a train!
The teacher once said to some students, "I was an orphan before your principal hired me."
The students said, "Oof, that is sad."
The teacher tried to ignore them and take attendance. She said, "Is anyone missing?"
The students said, "Your parents."
The teacher got offended and later that day quit her job.
SCP-173 has breached containment. This is not a joke. Multiple Keter class SCPs have breached containment. This is an XK class event. Evacuate the Earth and solar system. The world is ending!
Why can’t an orphan play baseball?
Answer: They don’t know where home is.
These ain't jokes. These are just sad truths.
Why do goalkeepers have so much money in the bank?
Because they are really good at saving.
When I was young, I decided to go to a medical school.
At the entrance exam, we were asked to re-arrange letters
'PNEIS'
and form the name of an important human body part which is most useful when erect.
Those who answered 'SPINE' are doctors.
What's 12 inches long, red, and when I force feed it to my wife, she cries?
Her miscarriage.
Jokes are like food, not everyone has it.
What do you call a lost Indian woman? Ms. Singh.
Q. What is the most endangered creature in India?
A. The baby girl.
Q: What’s a koala's face song? A: Never gonna give you up BECAUSE it hangs on the tree and the person is the tree?
"Nepal is a good place because it has been a great time for me."
A man walks into a bar... and he never walks out.
Anybody home? :)
XEvil 4.0: revolution in automatic CAPTCHA solution.
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When you're in the war and you die and say to God, "Where is the gulag?"
You: OMG I CAN'T BELIEVE ALL THE KRAP THEY HAVE BEEN THROUGH!
The other person: Who?
You aka answer: Your Butt cheeks.