Worst Jokes Ever

Jamal: Dads CAN grow on trees, Joseph.

Joseph: No, they don't.

Jamal: Yes, they do. I've seen it.

Joseph: ... that's not what you thought it was.

What is one thing humans do before they eat?

They beat their meat to make nuggets.

How was your day, Freshfry?

What did the chicken say after he died? Nothing.

How does the skeleton call his friends? With a tele-bone.

Why did the dog cross the road twice?

Because he was trying to catch a boomerang.

Old soviet joke.

"Who is your mother?" "Our great Soviet country." "Who is your father?" "Our dear comrade Stalin." "What's your greatest desire?" "Becoming an orphan."

Jack and Jill went up the hill so Jack could suck Jill’s candy.

Jack got a shock because Jill’s real name was Randy.

Your momma so fat when she jumped the world collapsed.

Your mom so fat, Thanos had to clap!

Mom! (DYM 48)

What is an orphan's favorite movie? Spider-Man: Homecoming.

Yooo, D.K. here!

Dad: Where is my son?

Son: Come join me with musical chairs, except we stand on them.

Dad: Ok, so do we put this round our neck?

Son: YES!

Mum: AHHHHHHHHHHHH

Haymoohay?

I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that’s just nuts.

When the school shooter enters the classroom and it's the quiet kid's dad.

Hey Gwen, reply to me and say if everything is alright.

Hey D.K., how are you? :)

Love you!

Once Jimmy was minding his own business, then he hears his mom come home. He asked, "Where have you been?" She replied with, "I was at work," yet he knew his mom did not have work. So the next day, while heading to school, he gets a phone call saying his mom is pregnant, and they want to try their device, and they need the baby's dad to say if it's alright.