Worst Jokes Ever

How to punish a blind kid, rearrange his bedroom.

If you're reading this, then good, let's stop this hating on this site! We can just get along, or if not, then don't say anything at all! "Kiss."

What do you call a bunch of bald paki in a swimming pool? Coco pops.

Sorry, no adults allowed.

Only 3 per person.

I told kids to make a family tree. God, I love working at the orphanages.

What's the difference between apples and orphans?

Apples get picked.

Why can't orphans play baseball?

They don't know where home is.

Imagine you are getting eaten by an alligator. What do you do?

Stop imagining!

Hi there! My name is Michael Grover, and I am an explorer. Ever since I’ve been little, I’ve loved searching for new things. As a baby, my parents kept finding me in nooks and crannies around the house. “On the search,” as they would say.

By the age of 5, I had been to every continent on the planet, barring Antarctica. For my 12th birthday, my parents got me diving lessons, and by the time I was 13, I could scuba dive to a depth of 40 meters, as well as go cave diving.

I got a pilot’s license by the age of 17, and I learned to sail just before my 18th birthday. Instead of going to university, I decided to travel around South America, exploring its rich jungles and beautiful landscapes.

During my trip, I met my now wife who was also an explorer. For our honeymoon, we sailed around the Caribbean, and we discovered 3 new islands which we named after the cats that I had growing up.

Over the course of my life, I have come across great treasures and wondrous experiences. But in all my life, and in all my travels, I’m afraid I have never come across a single person who cared about what you just said.

Me: *watching TV*

Mom: Omg, no way, your dad is coming!

Me: Really?

Mom: Obviously not, he never loved or wanted you.

What is the difference between anal and oral sex?

Oral sex makes your whole day. Anal sex makes your hole weak.

One time I was watching TV.

Mom: Omg, your dad is coming!

Me: Omg, really?

Mom: Sike, I lied.

I played catch with my friends, but they keep going to sleep when I throw it.

What do you call a group of depressed teenagers?

Suicide Squad.

If I wanted to kill myself, I would just climb up your ego and jump down to your IQ.

There was a woman from Ealing, she had a peculiar feeling. She laid on her back, opened her crack, and pissed all over the ceiling.

So I guess Ice Cube was right, Eazy's dick smelling like MC Ren's shit, and Eazy died of AIDS.

How do you surprise a blind guy? Leave the plunger in the toilet.

Why did the kid cry?

His dad didn't get the milk.

What do you call an octopus on land?

A spider, duh!