Worst Jokes Ever
A prisoner dug out of prison. He appeared in a playground. He said, "I'm free, I'm free!" A kid said, "So what? I'm four."
A man walks up to Lil Johnny one day and asks, "If you had one wish, but that wish will be granted to everyone on Earth... what would it be?"
So Lil Johnny thinks real hard and long, then said, "Well, I would wish for me to shit myself."
The man is shocked and asks why, and Lil Johnny replies, "Well, I would be on the toilet. I think everyone else would just be confused!"
Everyone: So, wait, let me get this straight. Feminists want to cancel Father's Day because it is offensive to single mothers.
Feminists: Correct.
Everyone: Then what the f*** is the point of Mother's Day?
Child: Hello, I can’t find my dad.
Stranger: Oh, well when and where did you last see him?
Child: Oh, I remember, 5 years ago he went to get some milk here.
A basketball player walks into a strip club:
"Hi, I heard I could bounce some balls here?"
What did the iceberg say to the Titanic?
"Go fuck yourself... at the bottom of the sea."
The only joke here is the topic.
What did Michael Jackson say to the little boy?
"Shhhhhhh, this might hurt a little."
Roses are white, violets are white, everything is white. I’m racist.
Why did a girl like bananas?
Because one day she might need to be ready.
What are the similarities between a pedophile and a 9/11 plane?
They both came from behind and crushed them.
What did the tissue wear?
A shoe.
There was an Indian riding in the desert when he saw a little blond-haired white girl up ahead. He heard her crying. So he went up to her and climbed down from his horse and asked her, "Hey, what’s going on? Why are you crying? Where are your parents? What happened?"
The girl said in a crying, sad voice, "The bandidos came, killed my father, my brothers, then my mother, and raped my sister."
The Indian just laughed, untied and dropped his breechcloth, then said, “Guess this isn’t your day, is it?”
Why do you only see girls in groups of 3, 5, 7, and 9?
Because they can’t even.
What is the most played game in Africa?
The Hunger Games.
A child is determined to burn his home down. His dad watched, tears in his eyes. He put his arm across the mother and stated, “That’s arson.”
You tell an orphan joke to an orphan. You start laughing, they start crying. They say they are going to tell their mom. Then you start laughing harder.
The emo kid ran away after his parents asked why they took the barcode sticker off the Oreos.
"Jiggle balls, jiggle balls, jiggle all the way."
"Dr. Squatch will heal the itch, and know it goes away, hey!"
Jack and Jill went up the hill so Jack can eat her candy. He got sick when he got a mouthful of dick and realized her name was Randy.