Worst Jokes Ever

You learn something new every day.

Like the people in 9/11 are the world's fastest readers; they went through 100s in under a second.

Why didn’t the Twin Towers like their pizza?

Cause it was plain.

Drop me in Afghanistan with a cigar, a Kobe jersey, a MAC-10, a Lambo Huracan with a bumper delete, and a Toyota Tacoma with an M249 on the back. Then I'll have Afghanistan as the 51st state by midnight.

Drop me in Afghanistan with a Dodge Challenger Super Stock, a Mexican named Jose, a 6 pack of Dr. Pepper, a golden SCAR, a pack of chimichangas, and an M4A1, and I'll have the Taliban saying the Pledge of Allegiance in 4 hours.

What’s harder than steel?

Michael Jackson in a playground.

God: Who ever kills Hitler will go to heaven.

Hitler: 👌👌👌👌

God: 😩😩😩😩

Is it a bird, is it a plane?

No, it’s a 9/11 victim.

I like the satisfying sounds of your butt being spanked.

Why do your orphans not drink beer?

Because last time they did, he went to suck some dudes' toes, then he tried to take him to his parents, but I guess that never happened.

If you have a bad day, just think there are at least 15 people who care about you.

Don’t feel bad about this day because there’s a saying: "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the present."

Why can't orphans play poker? Because they don't know what a full house is.

What’s an orphan's favorite movie?

"Home Alone."

A husband and wife get into a fight. The wife says, "Go blow off some steam. I’ll let you fuck a hooker." So he does that, comes back, and says, "I’m off the hook now!"

What is Satan's way to go to places? A helicopter.

I scored.

What did the Twin Towers' mom say when she fed them? "Open wide honey, here comes the airplane."

Q: Why can't orphans be gay?

A: They have nobody to call daddy.

I am a volcano.

What did the dad say to the kid?

Nothing, he went to get the milk.