Worst Jokes Ever
What cigarettes does Churchill's wife like to smoke?
Blue Winston.
Why can't orphans play baseball? They don't know where home run is.
I gave a deaf kid air pods for his birthday.
What is 3 feet tall and sits at the bottom of children's beds?
A: Garry Glitter's boots.
The Twin Towers are like snowmen; they fall and crumble.
One day an orphan threw a boomerang, but it came back, just like its parents.
Your forehead is like a line, it just keeps going.
How are laundry and Michael Jackson related?
They both got bleached!
"Hey, is that a peach?"
*gets slapped on the butt*
"Noted."
Why can't orphans have an iPhone?
They can't find the home button.
You're so fat that when you were born, the nurse mistook you for the father.
If I don't find a reason to live soon, my ceiling fan isn't the only thing that's gonna be hanging from my ceiling.
What is the difference between a priest and anesthesia?
The anesthesia takes time to put you under.
Why is the queen the most powerful piece in chess?
Because the board looks like a kitchen floor.
What were the twin towers plains?
God's playing Jenga.
At school in a classroom, the teacher asked the kid, βIf you have one dollar and your parents give you five dollars, how much do you have?β Everyone raised their hand except one little girl.
ok this isn't a joke but it's funny.
Roses are red, nuts are brown, Skirts go up, pants go down. Body to body, skin to skin, when it's stiff, stick it in. It goes in dry, comes out wet, the longer it's in, the stronger it gets. It comes out dripping and starts to sag, It's not what you think, it's a lipton tea bag.
Get your mind out of the gutter.
What's the difference between Nemo and my dad?
Nemo was eventually found.
Why do orphans not know Dom Toretto?
Dom Toretto cares about family.
Q: What did the ocean say to the other ocean?
A: Nothing, they just waved! π