Worst Jokes Ever
Your hairline goes so far back even Dora the Explorer couldn’t find it.
Today, I dreamt about giving head to Johnny Depp.
Then I woke up and realized that I forgot to roll my windows up when passing through the New Jersey Turnpike.
Johnny Depp once said in an interview: "I get older, my girlfriends stay the same age."
Maybe Johnny Depp's soulmate isn't born yet. We'll see in 20-25 years.
"Goodness, that's what Post Malone sounds like?"
"Give me some pre-Malone hip hop any day!"
I don't blame Amber Heard for wanting Elon Musk, especially if Johnny Depp is hairy and smells like a port-o-potty full of cigarettes and gunsmoke.
Hello guys!
Did you know Helen Keller had a sister?
Neither did she.
I don’t usually tell 9/11 jokes, they usually crash and burn.
What’s the only reason Emos drink?
To get hungover.
I would tell a Biden joke except everyone would not stop falling asleep (including him).
What is an orphan's least favorite snack?
"Dots HOMESTYLE Pretzels!"
Kid: Mom! You lied to me!
Mom: When?
Kid: You told me that my little brother was an Angel!
Mom: Sooo?
Kid: Then why didn’t he fly when I threw him off the balcony?
Mom: WHAT!!!??!!
Why do orphans go to public schools?
Who's going to homeschool them?
Why didn’t the orphan see the new movie?
It was "Spider-Man: No Way Home."
Why do orphans love school so much?
They have no HOMEWORK.
What is an orphan's favorite movie?
"Spider-Man: Homecoming"
Why wasn’t the orphan able to finish his cereal?
His parents never brought back the milk.
Whoever stole my Microsoft Office account, I'll make you pay. You have my word!
So little Johnny was on the bus, and the bus driver already hated him. So he started to talk to himself JUST loud enough for the bus driver to hear.
"If my dad was a bull, and my mom was a cow, that would make me... a little bull!"
"If my dad was a rooster, and my mom was a hen, that would make me... a little rooster!"
And by this point, the bus driver was fed up with him, so he said:
"Ok little Johnny, I got one for you: If your dad was a drunk, and your mom was a whore, what would that make you?"
Little Johnny smiled and said: "A bus driver!"
What’s Michael Jackson’s favorite holiday? 4th of July when they set off fireworks.