Worst Jokes Ever

What's the difference between an orphan and a bowl of apples?

The apples got picked!

Everybody asks, "What's up?" but nobody asks, "What's down?"

How is a beer can and an Indian the same? You can find them both smashed on the side of the road!

How do you name a Chinese kid?

Throw a frying pan on their head, "Ching Chong!"

Why did the transgender man only eat salad?

Because he was a "her" before.

Dude, people gotta stop letting 9/11 jokes fly around like bro, you're gonna make my brain explode!

Two sentence horror stories go.

"911, what’s your emergency?" I asked, listening to the quiet sobs of a little kid on the other end of the line.

“I think my daddy want to kill me,” the girl said and cried, making me freeze on the spot as I recognized my daughter’s voice.

They say we have a primal sense, that we can just feel when someone is watching us.

It’s been a few weeks, and it's clear that you do not have that sense.

Battery 1%.

I take one last look at Earth as my suit runs out of power.

I try and try every day, but 5 keep coming out. There's so money at this point my walls are built of babies.

I'm shidding. Still babies are still coming and going.

I shidded out my baby, then became a fish.

What's an orphan's favorite Roblox game?

Adopt Me.

F*** man, I just need a f***ing loli to walk all over me!

How many beans are there in Irish chili?

Answer: 239

Why are there two hundred and thirty-nine?

Answer: (spoken in Irish Brogues) Because if you add one more, it'd be "two farty."

The orphan also had to cry because the cartels called him "homie."

I asked the orphan if he wanted to watch all the Tom Holland Spider-Man movies with me, and he started crying.

You know what I like most about people with Parkinson's... Their handshake!

Why were the terrorists upset on 9/11? bcz 1 of the 4 missed its target.