My jokes

If R. Kelly was a therapist:

14 year old: I hate my life.

R. Kelly: I feel you.

Your face looks like my butt, but it looks like you.

There was a disabled kid at my door. He said, "I'm selling some cookies, want to buy one?" I said, "Well, if you stand up, sure."

What is white, then red, and is very fast?

My chainsaw blade.

Once my cat was playing video games. I was OVERWATCHing him.

I asked him to PAWS the game. He then hissed at me. I was surprised; he usually has a good PURRsonality. He said he YARNED to play the game.

My boyfriend is just like a sexy nerd and I still have to ask him things like that because I'm so distracted from him.

Your mom's my dad. Think about that!

I asked a man for ten dollars for a cup of coffee. The man said coffee was only a quarter. I told him I was putting all my begs in one ask-it.

Why do my kids die?

Stinky Oussy :D

What's the difference between me and my best friends?

At least one of us has a house.

Love is the best picture you can use to be able for her and I was able for her in the best place for her and I have to be honest and a great team of the team and the way it goes is the first 4th year of my life in my life as a new 💕.

My parents said to me, "Whenever you say sorry to someone and they say, 'It's okay,' it's really not."

So I said, "Okay."

Someone threatened to break into my house, but I am in a wheelchair. I said sure, and I moved everything upstairs and sat on the stairs so he couldn’t steal anything.

Like my daddy? Too bad you don't have one.

I'm bored. If you want to friend me in Roblox, my username is Talitha95g and my nickname is talithafromamirica.

Today, me and my best friend went to the Grand Canyon. He was taking up all the space by the edge, and I told him to back up. R.I.P. to him.

A lot of things changed when I got my girlfriend pregnant: my name, my address, and my phone number.

My mother told me to be positive, but she said that when I was going to do an AIDS test.

What’s the similarity between a broken pencil and my life? They’re both pointless.

My girlfriend dumped me, so I stole her wheelchair and guess who came crawling back!