Music jokes
What songs do people with no arms listen to?
None, 'cause they can’t press play.
Imagine Stephen Hawking was the real Slim Shady but could not stand up.
Why did Michael Jackson rush to H&M?
They had new Billie Jeans!
what song did people in Hiroshima listen to?
"Here Comes the Sun."
Why did Michael Jackson decide to sell the ranch?
Because it was over 10 years old.
Memes
How do you wake up Lady Gaga?
Poker Face.
What does Michael Jackson and an Xbox have in common?
They're both turned on by kids.
Why was Michael Jackson fired as a guitar teacher?
Because he fingered a minor.
The irony of metal jokes is pretty fun. But it leads to a lot of people stealing them.
What's black, gold, and red all over?
Tupac in Vegas.
What's long and not very hairy?
The conga line at the cancer department.
What's white and comes in little cans?
Michael Jackson.
Roses are red, violets are blue, my heart is dead, I'm such a fool. -Juice Wrld
What's a skeleton's favorite instrument? The exylo-bone!
What song does Saturn sing?
"If you like it then you should have put a ring on it."
What did Mickey Mouse and Michael Jackson have in common?: (What *didn't* they have in common)
Same red shorts, theme park in their backyard, white glove, soft voices, loved children, they both were black with white faces.
Q. Why is Stephen Hawking so good at air guitar?
A. Because he has excellent string theory.
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?
One's plastic and dangerous to play with; the other is to carry groceries.
What do you call a mariachi band sinking in Mayonnaise?
Cinco De Mayo.
What do you call it when you rickroll someone in the LGBTQ?
You just got fruit-rolled.