Me
The joke is Me
When was the only time you could see people base jump without a parachute? 2001/9/11
Remember that you're unique, just like everyone else
What’s the difference between Jesus and a hooker?
The look on their face when your nailing them
What do Jesus and I have in common? Our dads left us...
Joaquin Phoenix as The Joker is like Heath Ledger if he overdosed on prescription drugs... Oh, wait. He already did.
I like my bread how I like my wife: cold and stiff
What do you call a bus full of kids, kills killstreak
What do shemales and barns have in common?
Cocks
I give props to pedophiles
they always go slow in the school zones
If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?
How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Infinite because Feminists can't solve problems.
Q: What do you call a pigeon that is full of poop that flies in front of a car
A: A suicide bomber
You. You’re a joke.
What do pedophiles and Sandy Hook have in common?
Shooting up schoolchildren.
So Paul Walker made a rap cover. It is called straight out of windshield.
A girl asks her Asian boyfriend if he wants to eat her pussy. He asks her why she is taking off her clothes, instead of cooking her cat.
I’ll never forget my Granddad’s last words to me just before he died. “Are you still holding the ladder?”
Why does Stephen Hawking do one-liners? -- Because he can't do stand up.
Why did the blonde chick buy two Plan B pills?
She wanted to be for sure for sure
