Morbid jokes

Morbid Jokes

Steven Hawking

What's black and sits on the bottom of the stairs to the cellar?

Steven Hawking where the experiments went wrong.

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  • World hunger

    What do world hunger and a Mercedes have in common?

    Princess Diana couldn't stop both of them.

    Kitten

    How many dead kittens does it take to clog a pool filter? Seven when I tried!

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  • Child

    What does Earl Bradley and an Xbox have in common?

    They both get turned on by children.

    Therapist

    Sy'kyira (😌): I can't wait for the therapist to come.

    Daina (😊): Same, 30 minutes have passed... I also wonder what that loud sound is.

    Sy'kyira (πŸ˜…): SAME!!!! What, does it sound like a woman suffering???

    Daina (😌): I know, right?

    Baby

    How do you get 100 babies in the back of a pick up truck? Blender.

    How do you get them back out? Straw.

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  • Teeth

    What's the last thing that went through Curt Cobain's mind?

    His teeth.

    Kidney

    Why is it you donate one kidney, you're a hero, but donate four or five and people run and call the police?

    Study

    Studies have shown that in London, a person is stabbed 24 times a second. Poor bastard!

    Assault

    Today was a bittersweet day...

    Bad news is my friend was assaulted. Good news is I successfully sneak attacked someone!

    Death

    Do you know why the Royal family can no longer play Monopoly?

    How do you think Princess Diana died?

    ...Too soon?

    Lightbulb

    What is the difference between a lightbulb and a pregnant woman?

    You can unscrew a lightbulb.

    Guy

    Three guys are walking in a bar. A priest, a paedophile, and a rapist. That was just the first guy.