Morbid jokes

Morbid jokes

The kid with a gun walked into my classroom and fucking shot the teacher.

He pointed the gun at me and asked, "What's 2+2?" I answer him and he writes the answer down on his test. He did this with every kid. He got a 100%, expelled, and a lifetime in prison. Hey, at least he gets free food.

When I was a kid, my hamster died, so my mum bought a new identical one, hoping I wouldn't notice. It didn't matter anyway, since I beat that one to death, too.

SON: “Mommy, I found Daddy!”

MOM: “What did I tell you about digging in the garden?”

School was fun, but it was hard, almost like riding a bike that’s on fire and the grounds on fire and everything’s on fire because it’s hell.

What has teeth but doesn't use them to chew? The answer would be a comb or a piano, but technically, if you ripped someone's teeth out and hand them to them, they have teeth but can't chew with them.