Miscellaneous Jokes

What do you call an elephant and a rhino mix?

Helliphino!

Three Jewish people walk into a bar.

Cyber bully: Your mom giey.

Me: nO U

My dad is a pussy.

Why couldn't the clown walk after his infamous knife-juggling act?

Because he was exhausted nigaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

Have you seen the new movie "Constipated"?

No, it hasn't come out yet.

Everyone reading this is gay!

My class is my house is quite. I suck a dick, now one cares.

So, about a year ago I was riding a horse, and out of nowhere the horse tried to flip me off it and I fell off. I would have been OK, but my foot got stuck in the stirrup. The horse dragged me along and didn't stop.

I would have died if it weren't for the Walmart manager who came out and unplugged the horse.

A gay couple actually goes to heaven. Turns out Jesus was a hypocrite.

What is the difference between a man peering through the key hole and a woman in the bath?

One is rude and nosy; the other is rude and nosy.

How do you circumcise a redneck? Kick his sister in the jaw.

After a long labor, a doctor approaches the new mother and says, “Ma’am, I’ve got some good news, and some bad news. What would you like?” After quickly thinking it over, she responds, “I’ll have the bad news first, doctor.”

The doctor replies, “Well, I’m not sure how to put this, and I’m sorry to have to tell you, your child has red hair.”

Relieved, a smile spreads across the mother’s face. “Doctor, if that’s the bad news, what’s the good news?” The doctor replies, “He’s dead.”