Miscellaneous jokes
Why do Native Americans hate snow? Because it's white and settles on their land.
This is a lot like anal sex.
You always miss 100% of the shots if you don't take it.
Why did half of the world go to hell?
Because they were laughing at morbid jokes.
(You've been warned!)
What does a tuna, piano, and a tub of glue have in common?
You can tune a piano, but you can't piano a tuna.
But what about the glue? said Bob I. I knew you would get stuck on that!
Once, there was a brother and a sister that shared a YouTube channel. He named it "Penis Dick Marathon."
Roses are red, Justin Bieber is gay, But most importantly, You know de way.
So, a guy walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says, "I’ll give you a drink if you can tell me a meta joke." So the guy says, "Alright, so a guy walks into a bar and asks for a drink." The bartender says, "I’ll give you a drink if you can tell me a meta joke." So the guy says, "So a guy walks into a bar and asks for a drink." The bartender says, "I’ll give you a drink if you can tell me a meta joke." So the guy says, "So a guy walks into a bar and asks for a drink." The bartender says, "Okay, here you go." So he gives the guy a drink, so he gives the guy a drink, so he gives the guy a drink.
20 fridges are loaded onto a plane, only 19 come off. Okay, moving on. You took too long.
How many steps does it take to put an elephant into a fridge? (*Their reply* I don't know how many.)
3, Open the fridge, put the elephant into the fridge, and close the door. How do you put a giraffe into the fridge? (*Their reply* 3...)
Wrong. 4, Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the giraffe, and close the door. Why did Sally fall off the swing? A fridge fell on her.
Three Jewish people walk into a bar.
My friends.
My friend asked me how fast my humor was, and I said it jumps borders. Then he asked how dark my humor is, and I said it picks cotton.
I'm still playing hide & seek with my dad.
Q: What's the best part about gardening?
A: Getting down and dirty with your hoes.
Your life.
Who does Adolph Hitler call in an emergency?
Nein, nein, nein!
If a person walks off a hundred-foot cliff and halfway down screams, "Why did I do that?" Then a second person walks off the same one-hundred-foot cliff and screams the same verse, "Why did I do that?" Then another person walks off the cliff and screams the same line, "Why did I do that," and the next person does the same thing. What do you call that?
(Stupid People)
Lesbians and blind women wear the same clothes.
If tomatoes are a fruit, does that mean ketchup is a smoothie?
Did Jesus die virgin? Nope, he got nailed before he died.
Wanna hear a joke? You.