Miscellaneous jokes
What is the difference between lettuce and a hamburger?
When the lettuce runs, the hamburger cries.
I like my woman like I like my wine, 12 years old and locked in the basement.
Jack and Jill went up the hill so Jack could lick her candy, but Jack had a shock and a mouth full of cock, and Jill's real name was Randy.
I have friends.
How do you make a blond snowman? You can't, you have to hollow out the head.
Don't let an extra chromosome keep you down!
What's the difference between a grape and an elephant?
I don't know, what?
They are both purple except for the elephant.
Why was 6 so afraid of 7?
7 killed 6's parents.
Sometimes I just want to toss a flash bang into a room full of epileptic kids.
What kind of file do you need to turn a 15 mm hole into a 40 mm hole? A pedophile.
Did you hear about the two-car pile-up in Mexico? Yeah like 200 Mexicans died.
What do you call a three humped camel?
A prostitute from New York.
If you hate America, I don't like you :)
Why did the out of shape cow quit her job?
She got tired of jumping over the moon.
I like my coffee like I like my women.
Follow me on Instagram @v2good.at.fortnite and @v2good.at.edits for a surprise.
Btw, you have to like all my posts :)
What does Donald Trump say when he declares war? Nuke them.
What does a pervert say when he declares war? Nude them.
I used to work at a bank, then I lost interest.
Not all self-harmers are emo, but all emos self-harm.
What did the Emo say to the surgeon? "Cut me, please!"