Middle East jokes
Three disabled guys (a blind man, an amputee, and a guy in a wheelchair) are flying back with the USA team from the Paralympic games in the Middle East when their plane crashes in the Sahara Desert. The three disabled guys (the only survivors) are now stranded and wait for someone to rescue them, but no one showed. They start to get real thirsty, so they decide to seek out water. The amputee leads the way, with the blind man pushing the guy in the wheelchair; and, eventually they find an oasis. The amputee leader goes into the water first, cools himself down, drinks a load of water, walks out the other side and lo and behold, he has a NEW LEG! He gets excited and encourages his friends to do the same.
The blind man offers to push the guy in the wheelchair, but he gets refused because the guy in the chair wants to be Mr. Independent and insists the blind man goes ahead first. So he goes into the water, cools himself down, drinks a load of water, walks out the other side and lo and behold, he can SEE! Now the guy in the wheelchair's getting really excited, starts pushing with all his might, goes into the water, cools himself down, drinks a load of water, and wheels out the other side. Lo and behold, NEW TIRES!!!
People joke about 9/11, but it's not funny. My dad died in 9/11. Best pilot in Saudi Arabia.
"You're da bomb!" "No, you're da bomb!"
In America, a compliment. In the Middle East, an argument.
Where does Bin Laden keep his CDs?
In Iraq.
How did I escape from Iraq, Iran?
You should never try Afghan weed because people in Afghanistan get stoned to death.
My uncle died on nine eleven... he was the best pilot in Iraq.
In Saudi Arabia, our pick up lines are, "Girl, are you a terrorist? Cuz you da bomb."
I don't like it when people make 9/11 jokes. My dad was in it.
He was the best damn pilot in Saudi Arabia.
What do you say after you go out for middle eastern food? I falafel (feel awful)!
Let me tell you how I escaped Iraq. Iran! (;)
I ate the last of my Egyptian food, and now I falafel. I don't know why I made that joke. Probably just becuscus.
A guy walks into a mosque... then blows up.
What is the difference between an ISIS training camp and a school?
Don't ask me, I just fly the drone.
"You're the bomb"—a compliment in the USA.
An argument in the Middle East.
What do Colorado and Saudi Arabia have in common?
It's legal to get stoned.