Mexican jokes
What do you call a Mexican who lost his car?
- Carlos.
What do you call two Mexicans at a country restaurant? "Two beaners in a cracker house."
Why did Mexicans go to Area 51?
To show them what a real illegal alien looks like.
A Mexican was doing a magic trick. He said, "uno, dos," then disappeared without a trace.
When China built the Great Wall, the Mongols invaded them and founded the Yuan dynasty. With Trump building his wall, will the Mexicans invade the US and found the Juan dynasty?
Why does Mexico never hold the Olympics? Because everyone that can run, jump, and swim is already out of the country.
How do Mexicans feel about Trump's wall? -- They'll get over it.
Three guys are on a plane: one is Asian, one is Mexican, and the other is an American. The pilot says, "There is too much weight on the plane, you all need to throw something off." So the Mexican threw out a burrito and said, "I have plenty of these where I come from." Then the Asian threw out some rice and said, "I have plenty of these in my country." The American threw out a bomb and said, "I have a lot of these in my country."
The plane crashes anyway, and the three men start to walk away from the crash. As they were walking, they found a boy crying. They asked him what was wrong, and he said, "A ton of burritos fell out of the sky and got me all messy." The men started walking away and soon enough they found another boy crying. They asked him what was wrong, and he said, "A ton of rice fell out of the sky and shredded all my clothes." The guys knew who did it but avoided the trouble. They kept on walking and found a kid laughing so hard he was on the ground, and they asked what had been so funny. The boy said, "MY GRANDPA FARTED AND THE HOUSE BLEW UP!!!"
Why did the Mexican take Xanax?
For Hispanic attacks.
How's Donald Trump going to get rid of all the Mexicans? -- Juan by Juan.
Yo mama so stupid she thinks Taco Bell is a Mexican phone company.
Mexican runs into a wall. He loses hope.
Drop me in Afghanistan with a Dodge Challenger Super Stock, a Mexican named Jose, a 6 pack of Dr. Pepper, a golden SCAR, a pack of chimichangas, and an M4A1, and I'll have the Taliban saying the Pledge of Allegiance in 4 hours.
What do you call a roach in milk?
A roach con leche. 😂
What's the only thing Mexicans can unwrap on Christmas? Tamales.
There's four people on a roof: a Mexican, an Asian, a black guy, and a white guy. The Mexican walks over to the ledge and says, "This is for my people," and jumps off. The Asian also walks over to the ledge and says, "This is for my people," and jumps off. Then, the black guy walks over to the edge and says, "This is for my people," and pushes the white guy off.
What's the difference between a Mexican and a book?
The book has papers.
What do you call a pessimistic Mexican?
A Mexican't.
Mexican Comedy Week
Margarita Monday Taco Tuesday Wetback Wednesday Tequila Thursday Fiesta Friday Shake It Saturday Sneaky Sunday
What do you call a burned Mexican? A fried torteya.