Mental Health jokes
My dad is like my depression, you need a suicide letter to find him.
What's the difference between a Christian and a schizophrenic?
Nothing.
I told my therapist I feel suicidal. He charged me in advance.
What's overcrowded and uncomfortable?
My mind.
You know what really gets me under my skin when I'm down? Sharpener blades.
My heart says to stop because it hurts.
Bro, chill. It's really not that deep.
I’ve got money and suicidal thoughts, and I’m all out of money.
My therapist said I have trouble letting go of the past. So I killed him.
What do you call a group of emo kids?
The suicide squad.
I was watching The Conjuring with an emo person. She said she likes the part where the girl was hanging. I said, "Why? Because you wish it were you?"
To people who say that depression hits hard...
The car begs to disagree.
I cannot moderate myself at all. It's either I don't take my meds, or I take the entire bottle. Decisions, decisions...
When you're asked to tell a crazy story, but the first thing that comes up to your mind is a suicide attempt:
"Oh, I don't remember anything in particular. 😅😀"
What's worse than depression & suicide?
Easy: LIVING. Everyday you wish you were dead but then reality hits you in the face that you're still alive and have to suffer living.
Pretend or not pretend, we have to decide everyday even if we don't pretend no one will notice :) no one ever does :). Living is the problem to everything. We get depression cuz of it and so much. Why can't we just die :)?
What do you call it when a friend calms his suicidal friend? "Hang in there, buddy."
What's a depressed person's favorite drink?
Depresso expresso.
JK, bleach.
What do depressed kids and sloths have in common? They both hang from trees.
what's a depressed person's favorite game?
hangman
These jokes cheered me up from suicide. This is amazing material. God bless all of you.
What does a depressed person and a fashion enthusiast have in common?
They both have something hanging in their closet.