Meal jokes
I love eating pussy. That’s why the animal shelter is always my go-to for a good meal.
What do skeletons say before they begin dining?
Bone-appetit!
Why can't an orphan go to McDonald's? There's no point in the words "happy meal."
Where can you never take an orphan to dinner?
Family restaurants.
what do you call a baby in an oven?
my next meal.
Why is bacon called bacon and cookies called cookies if you cook bacon and bake cookies?
What did a terrorist say when New York didn't want his food?
"Here Comes The Airplane!"
Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate nine. But why did seven eat nine? Because seven knew you had to have three squared meals a day.
What is a gay person’s favourite meal?
Willy con carne.
When do astronauts eat?
At launch time!
Can emos eat a happy meal, or is it a depressed meal?
After 12, it's lunch. 😂
Did you hear about the new P. Diddy meal in McDonald's? It's a 56-year-old meat inside a 12-year-old bun.
Americans won't have a Thanksgiving Dinner this year. Why not? They sent their turkey to the White House.
My daughter said I could never make a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen the look on her face when I drove pasta!
Why do orphans have water with their cereal? Because their dad never came back with the milk.
What do you call a chicken looking at a bowl of salad?
A chicken sees a salad (chicken Caesar salad).
Yo momma is so ugly, she made my Happy Meal cry.
An old man walks to a busy restaurant. He tells the waiter what he wants and asks her, "Can I have a discount? I served in the war."
The waitress says, "Of course, and would you like that meal with sauce?"
"Nein," said the old man.
What do lesbians cook for dinner?
They don't, they just eat out.