Mathematics jokes
Using pi, distract the fat kid next to you so you can copy his answers.
A farmer counted 196 cows in the field.
But when he rounded them up, he had 200.
Q. What did the math book say to the other math book?
A. I have too many problems.
My friend asked me to round up here 37 sheep.
I said “40.”
Why was 10 afraid? Because he was 'tween 9 and 11.
If you people find this confusing, nothing is because CHEESE IS CHEESE!!!
Why is every number scared of 7?
Because 7 "ate" 9.
When I was in middle school, I was kidnapped by a terrorist organization.
Al-gebra.
What is one plus one?
It's TOO hard!
Who invented fractions?
Henry the 1/8.
How would you multiply numbers in octoschool?
You octoply, obviously.
Why is 3 such a helpful number? Because 3 helped out on a science project 4 5!
Why did all the numbers laugh at 22? Because it had "tu tu's."
There were 25 cows, 28 chickens. How many didn't?
(Ten, if you count in base 13!)
What do cows use for math? A cow-culator 😏
Why is six so scared? Because seven eight nine! 😂
2 + 2 is 4, minus one, that's 3. Quick maths.
There was one girl. She met 5000 guys. She had sex with each of them seven times. She became... - flip screen (=).
I had a conversation with a Möbius strip.
It was one-sided.
Two cunts were walking down the street.
One was doing calculus, and the other one says, "Imagine me, a stupid cunt that can talk...."
If Carlos and Jose took a brownie from me and I had 10 to start, what do I have?
Answer: A math problem.