Mate jokes
Rape isn't a joke.
It's a type of way of making friends and to mate with other women.
It's a way of art, and works on anybody!
Like this if you agree.
Little Johnny said to his mate, "I bet I can make you swear." His mate said, "Good luck." So Johnny told his mate that he slept with his sister. His mate yelled, "I'm gonna fucking kill you!"
Ol' Mate Shane Warne has sadly passed away. He was probably Australia's Greatest Ever Cricketer. RIP Ol' Mate Warney, died doing what you loved, having gay sex with men and doing cocaine! π₯π₯π₯π₯π₯π₯π₯π₯
Like if you RIP Shane Warne π¦πΊπ¦πΊπ¦πΊπ¦πΊπ¦πΊπ¦πΊπ¦πΊπ¦πΊπ¦πΊπ¦πΊπ¦πΊπ¦πΊπ¦πΊπ¦πΊπ¦πΊπ¦πΊπ¦πΊ
"Not all treasure is silver and gold, mate."
I was playing Warzone last night, and I shot my teammate that said they were emo. When I shot him, another player did, and it said "assist kill."
What 16 stoner rode a Derby winner?
Lester Piggott's cellmate.
If Finding Nemo was scientifically correct, Marlin would have changed into a female and mated with Nemo.
What's blue, red, and white and dead all over?
Trump's dead Russian mates.
What do black men in the NBA like about going to the locker room after they are done playing basketball?
Receiving golden showers from other black teammates.
If Will Smith had a revolver and said, "Who fucked my wife?" Chris Rock would say, "You don't have enough bullets, mate."
What do you call two monkeys who share the same Amazon account? Prime mates.
Why did the rock not risk going to the other side of the road?
It's a damn rock, mate. It's not gonna walk!
I was absolutely fuming when I found out my mate was rifling through my mum's knicker drawer.
No one goes in there without my permission!
A guy walks into a bar with a .44 magnum and yells: "Who the fuck fucked my wife?"
Everybody is silent for a second, then the bartender said: "Mate, you ain't got enough bullets!"
Why did the hedgehog cross the road? To show he had guts.
Why did the other hedgehog cross the road? To see his flat mate.
Couldn't believe how much of a bad mood my work mate was in this morning. So I decided to ask him what was the matter and if everything was OK with his wife, Flo.
He then broke down crying and said when he got home the night before, he caught his wife in bed with the plumber. I tried to console him as best as I could, but he just couldn't get over flow.
My mates threw nuts at the wall, now we call them walnuts.
Hahaha :)
Why was my mate in "Mission: Impossible?" Because he couldn't find his dad.
Bully: My d*ck is longer than your password.
Me: Sorry mate, it's so short, get a longer one! π€£
So two dudes were at a bar and out of nowhere they hear, "Oi mate, talk to me like that again, I'm gonna shove this stick so far up your ass you'll look like a Popsicle."