Magician jokes

What do you call a magician that makes beer? Brew-dini?

Two magicians were in a competition. The first one did magic, and the second started counting down, "3, 2," but before he said the last number, he 1.

What do you say to a magician with autism?

Are you "Autism-ic?"

What did Harry Houdini say when he did his famous vanishing act at a sushi place?

"Now sashimi, now you don't!"

Once there was this Whichdoctor. He walked barefoot most of the time, which gave him impressive calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, and the food gave him bad breath, which made him (wait for it) a Super Callused Fragile Mystic Hexed By Halitosis.

What do magicians and prostitutes have in common?

Answer: disappearing acts.

There was once a Spanish magician. He said, "Uno, dos..." and he disappeared without a tres.

What is an orphan's dad's job?

A magician because he makes himself disappear.

What do you call a rapper who's also a magician?

Eminem-o the Great.

I'm a magician. Watch my closing act at the end of the rope.

What do you call a dog magician?

A labracadabrador.

A magician walks up to a girl and asks her to feel the rabbit in the magician's hat.

The magician asks the girl to rub the rabbit. The girl notices the rabbit sticks up and drools; the hat was covering the hips.

What do you call a magician who has lost their magic?

Ian.

There was a magician on board the Titanic and said that he could make anything disappear.

Once the ship had gone down one of the passengers said to him, "Go on, so what did you do with the ship then?"

What did the magician do as a trick in his show?

Make your doubts about magic... DISAPPEAR!

The kid's dad was a magician because he disappeared and never came back.

Once upon a time, there was a magician named Daniel. He usually did gigs for children, and this time he was working at a kid's birthday party. He walked in and said, "Hi boys and girls, my name is Daniel." He performed multiple tricks, each one amazing the children. Then, he said, "And for my final trick; I will disappear!" He lifted up a blanket and when it fell down he was gone.

Then, the birthday boy said, "Hey, he's like my dad."

"Really?" asked a little girl.

"I guessed?" he said back, "My dad wasn't a magician, but he disappeared. I haven't seen him since...."

I was doing a magic show. I tried to make a bunny disappear, but it didn’t work.

I walked outside in shame. I looked up and realised the towers had disappeared!!!!

A Mexican magician says he will disappear on the count of three. He says, "uno, dos..." and poof! He disappears without a tres.