Madness

Madness jokes

Dog

  • My girlfriend's dog died, so to cheer her up I went out and got her an identical one.

    She went mad, "What am I going to do with two dead dogs?"

  • 0
  • Rape

  • I'm so mad I got arrested for rape, even though the girl never said no. The prosecution said she was mute, but how was I supposed to know? She never told me.

  • 11
  • Skeleton

  • Sans: Why couldn't the skeleton go to prom?

    Papyrus: Why? AND YOU KNOW I HATE PUNS!

    Sans: Because they had NO BODY to go with.

    Papyrus: THAT IS ENOUGH!!!

    Sans: Sorry, didn't mean to GET UNDER YOUR SKIN.

    Papyrus: YOU HAVE MADE ME MAD TO THE BONE SANS......wait

    Sans: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

  • 2
  • Cellphone

  • You used to call me on your cellphone when you need my love.

    Mad girl: SHUT UP! YOU ARE SO ANNOYING! I DON'T WANT TO CALL YOU ON MY CELL PHONE!

    Sister

  • My sister got mad when I told her to say this word 10 times, and she got in trouble, and it was a funny word that she did not even know what she was saying, ahhahaha! 😆 lol

    Victim

  • Why were the victims of 9/11 so mad?

    Because they ordered a pepperoni pizza, but all they got was a plane.

  • 0
  • Bone

  • My friend wasn't laughing at my jokes, so I said, "Is your funny bone broken?" But he got mad, and then I said, "Do you have a bone to pick with me?" He tried to insult me, but I said, "Call me what you want, I got thick skin," and this story was down to the bone.

  • 0
  • Injury

  • If you ever get mad at a person that crumpled their leg, don't forget that they can hide, but they can't run.

  • 0
  • Gamer

  • Why was the new gamer mad when they were playing Overwatch? Because gamer girl WAS ALREADY TRACER.

    Pizza

  • Why were the people during 9/11 mad? They ordered 2 sausage pizzas, but instead they got 2 plane pizzas.

    Cow

  • Two cows are standing in a field. One cow says to the other, "What do you think about that mad cow disease?"

    The other replies, "Well I don't have to worry about it. You're talking to a telephone pole."