Love jokes
The bible says to love your neighbors as you love yourself.
So I treat everyone like garbage.
Why is Mrs. Grapes 🍇 a good mother?
Because she loves raisin' kids.
Why are fire trucks big?
To hang out with the firefighters!
What did one dog say to another dog? I love you.
I love the letters of the alphabet.
A man was sitting in the restaurant and ordered a whole buffet. He is visited by an oracle. Apollo says, "If you eat that buffet, everyone you love will die."
"Up yours," the man said, "What are they going to die of, famine?"
Moments later, there was an incident that took place in the restaurant. Everyone literally died. It turned out the restaurant had a B-. I said, "Is that really a thing groaning on the hospital?"
The doctor said, "Know that is your condition, you have hepatitis B-."
"What the FU***** SH**"
Apollo is sitting in Mount Olympus, dying also in laughter.
What is hard about having a relationship with an astronaut?
They are always so distant! :-]
I love Brussel sprouts more than I love myself.
Once upon a time, three babies were born in 2015. She was always crying for 2015. He loves her birth date. 🤗😈🤗🤕🤒no🤗🤑😱😎🙌🙏🙈🙉🙊
Real quick, I'm autistic, and if anyone asks, I absolutely love some of these jokes. XD I found this while doing some research for a paper.
Why did the kids love the mushrooms?
Because they're fun-guys!
It's ironic that the more other people love you, the more you hate yourself.
How do skeletons make love?
They bone each other!
I named my dog Chicken.
I love eating chicken.
They said I was depressed, I should make an effort to do what I love.
I had to pay a hooker for twelve hours work.
... I felt nothing, but it was nice, being with someone who felt the same.
Doctor: I'm sorry, but you still have 10 seconds left.
Man: What?! What about my family?! My son is still missing! I can't just leave like that!
Doctor: Don't worry sir, I told your family.
Man: That's... great... if they found my son, tell them that I love him more than anything and I couldn't keep that promise.
The doctor watches the man closing his eyes while tears fell down from his eyes.
Doctor: I will... dad...
Tq for reading my crappy joke.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Olive.
Olive who?
Olive you ♥️.
When you're sitting in class and the quiet kid yells, "Lovely day, isn't it?" ... and you see a Glock shape in his pocket.
I love working with animals, especially when I get to hear their cries of help.
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Your love life.