Lost jokes

How do you tell when a blonde just lost her virginity?

Her crayons are still wet.

Imagine if you were an Arabic person shopping at Walmart with your son.

Now imagine he got lost and you had to start calling out his name.

...Now imagine his name is "Allahu Akbar."

Your forehead is so big, Megamind thought he was your long lost sibling.

As I grow older, I remember all the people I lost along the way. Maybe tour guide wasn't the right career choice for me...

I walked into an orphanage and asked a kid why they were crying.

They said: "Because I lost my parents."

I said: "Let's find them."

They cried harder, so I walked out of the orphanage.

Why are Americans so bad at class royals?

Because they already lost 2 towers.

You lost 30 lbs when you joined Weight Watchers, and lost another 10 lbs when they shaved your back.

A dog walked into a tavern and said, “I can’t see a thing. I’ll open this one.” The humor of it is probably related to the Sumer way of life (and has been lost), but the words remain.

What's the same with your dad and Retail Row?

They are both off the map.

A dog walked into a tavern and said, "I can't see a thing. I'll open this one."

The humor of it is probably related to the Sumer way of life (and has been lost), but the words remain.

Kid me: I lost my stick.

Teacher: No, you didn’t.

Kid me: How do you know that?

Teacher: It’s hanging out of your pants.

Why does Britain suck at chess?

They lost their queen.

Why doesn't the U.S. Government play Clash of Clans?

Because they lost two towers already.

Why do orphans like boomerangs more than their parents? The boomerang comes back.

One day I saw a kid cry, so I go, "Let's go find your parents." I miss my job at the orphanage.

Why do orphans get lost on boats? They can't find the home room.

"Ring Ring! Hi, I've been needing to call you. Your hairline has been found by Dora after 25 years!"

I ran into a kid today. Now I'm in jail and I lost my driver's license.

How did the cannibal know the girl he was eating for dinner had COVID-19?

She lost her taste.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?

"Where's my tractor!"

I lost my job making storage units for the police after a week. I guess you could say it was a brief case.

I got fired from my paramedic job on the first day. I told an eight-year-old who lost his leg in a car accident to "walk it off."