The teacher said made the kids guess what a random word was and it was honey. She also gave them a sample of honey to make it a little easier. Teacher said that it was something that you eat and what parents call each other. Little Johnny said, “I know what it is now! Spit them out now guys, their Buttholes!”
A teacher was teaching her second-grade class about the government, so for homework that one day, she told her students to ask their parents what the government is. When Little Johnny got home that day, he went up to his dad and asked him what the government was. His dad thought for a while and answered, “Look at it this way: I’m the president, your mom is Congress, your maid is the workforce, you are the people and your baby brother is the future.” “I still don’t get it,” responded Little Johnny. “Why don’t you sleep on it then? Maybe you’ll understand it better,” said the dad. “Okay then...good night,” said Little Johnny and went off to bed.
In the middle of the night, Little Johnny was awakened by his baby brother’s crying. He went to his baby brother’s crib and found that his baby brother had taken a crap in his diaper. So Little Johnny went to his parent’s room to get help. When he got to his parent’s bedroom, he looked through the keyhole to check if his parents were asleep. Through the keyhole, he saw his mom loudly snoring, but his dad wasn’t there. So he went to the maid’s room. When he looked through the maid’s room keyhole, he saw his dad having sex with his maid. Little Johnny was surprised, but then he just realized something and thinks aloud, “OH!! Now I understand the government! The President is screwing the workforce, Congress is fast asleep, nobody cares about the people, and the future is full of s**t!”
Little Jonny what you like air plane how because you fly fast and jump high
Why did Michael Jackson rush over to K-Mart one morning 🌄? Because he heard little boys 👦 pants 👖 were half off!
These people who are offended by rape jokes don’t even understand humor. They think of humor as like a happy thing because humor makes us laugh and laughter makes us happy, but most of the jokes that we laugh at are filled with pain and suffering. If I take a joke like, how many police officers does it take to change a light bulb? None, they just beat the room for being black. Now that joke isn’t making light of the fact that people have marched in the civil rights movement and people have been racially discriminated against. It’s not making light of those, what it’s doing is it’s taking that pain and suffering and making you transcend it for a moment, and showing the absurdity of the human mind, and that is important. Humor at its best takes the bad things in this world that are painful and hard to deal with and makes it something funny.
And before you go in the comments and say I agree with rape, I don’t. I hope everybody who rapes someone to have their dick cut off. My little sister got fucking raped when she was six, and the guy is lucky he got caught by the police and not me, cause if I caught I would have fucking killed him, so I don’t agree with rape, but I still think rape jokes should still not be taken so seriously!
little johnny's mom got a call from school saying to come over, as she dose she is met by the principal. they go into his office and the principal say "your son is going to be suspended for a week for blowing clouds in the bathroom." the mother responds "he is fifteen, how is he blowing clouds already? bring him in here." a boy walks in and johnnys mother says "this isnt my son, bring him in here i would like a word with him." the principal replies "ma'am, this is clouds." the mother feints
Little Johnny is a trucker. He stops at a bar. Johnny sees a sign that says, "Hamburgers for two dollars, cheeseburger for three dollars, handjob for ten dollars." He walks up to the bartender and whispers to her, "Are you the one that gives the handjobs for ten dollars?" She replies, "Yes, that's me." Johnny says, "Well, can you wash your hands because I want a cheeseburger?"
Little Johnny was playing outside and steps on a honeybee. His dad sees this and says, "I saw what you did and for that, you get no honey for two weeks." Johnny replies, "I don't care, I don't like honey anyway." About fifteen minutes later, Little Johnny is playing with the butterflies and rips the wings off of one. His dad bursts out and says, "I saw that, and for it you get no butter for a month." Little Johnny replies, "I don't care, I don't like butter anyway." Both Little Johnny and his dad go in for dinner. Johnny's mother sees a cockroach on the ground and steps on it. Little Johnny looks and smiles and says, "Do you want to tell her or should I?"
Dog the dog and maggie were frightened of her and the kangaroo said that she had to be in a hospital with a doctor jokes and maggie was walking i was going to off the road to the city hall to see her and her and I said that the only one piece dress for women readymade rb collection as he was walking in the city and maggie was a little bit more on the side of it
Why did Orphans have to drink there own piss? Because last time they went to the bar they went with there dad and drank some corona then got drunk and started eating someones toenails so his dad went to go get the milk and everybody has to evacuate the bar then the Orphan started walking on his teeth and got listed for the top ten wanted animals in the world so then he felt wanted and went to go home and had nobody to go to so he found the beer bottle he drunk out of and started pissing in it so he wouldnt die and loved it so then someone saw him in the bushes pissing in a beer bottle then drinking so the person who saw him started recording and posted it on youtube and the boy became famous so now he can feel like he was wanted in life after daddy went to go get the milk then the little boy became really rich
Cradles-By Sub Urban and watersharky Music Productions- I live inside my own world of make-believe Kids screaming in their cradles, profanities I see the world through eyes covered in ink and bleach Cross out the ones who heard my cries and watched me weep I love everything Fire's spreading all around my room My world's so bright It's hard to breathe but that's alright Hush Shh Tape my eyes open to force reality (oh no, no) Why can't you just let me eat my weight in glee? I live inside my own world of make-believe Kids screaming in their cradles, profanities Some days I feel skinnier than all the other days And some days I can't tell if my body belongs to me I love everything Fire's spreading all around my room My world's so bright It's hard to breathe but that's alright Hush Shh I wanna taste your content Hold your breath and feel the tension Devils hide behind redemption Honesty is a one-way gate to hell I wanna taste consumption Breathe faster to waste oxygen Hear the children sing aloud It's music 'til the wick burns out Hush Just wanna be care free lately, yeah Just kicking up daisies Got one too many quarters in my pockets Count 'em like the four-leaf clovers in my locket Untied laces, yeah Just tripping on daydreams Got dirty little lullabies playing on repeat Might as well just rot around the nursery and count sheep
Zebra couldn't find any grass then he saw the monkey cooking he thought to steal a little but he was burned in the fore and th smoke was all over him but when he to the ocean it's still there and zebras are stuck in this stile forever
i will never forget my little brothers last word rip.
his last words: paint dosent taste good
Little Johnny was not paying attention in class so the teacher told him do you know what happens when you don't pay attention. Little Johnny said no what. She answered, the principals office. Then little Jhonny said hey teach do you know what it means when you have balls on your chin? The teacher answered, no what. You have a D!ck in your mouth.
Me: Sister are you wearing makeup? My sister wearing all the worlds makeup* Sister: Just a little
LITTLE JOHNNY WAS AT HOME AND THEN HE WENT TO HIS GRANDMA'S HOUSEHE WENT THERE TO CUSS SO HE WOULDN'T GET IN TROUBLE. AND SECRETLY GRANDMA CALLED HIS MOMMA TO COME PICK HIM UP. MOMMA ASK WHAT LITTLE JOHNNY DID AND SHE SAID HE CUSSED AND CUSSED AND CUSSED. GRANNY HAD ENOUGH AND CALLED MOM AGAIN MOMMA SAID LITTLE JOHNNY WAS GROUNDED FOR 2 WEEKS AND LITTLE JOHNNY CUSSED SOME MORE NOW HE GROUNDED FOR 3 WEEKS
What is the fastest thing in the world?
James Charles when he sees little boys.
One Tuesday afternoon Little Jonny Decides he wants extra Homework So he went to his teacher and said,Hello can I have extra homework this week and the teacher replied with,Sure be at my house Friday afternoon to cut my lawn, Polish the counters,Scrub the Baseboards,Scrub and paint the walls! And johnny replied with,That's not what I Ment but at least I'll get paid! And The Teacher said, How about 200 each job? Johnny replied with,OK (Friday afternoon at her house After Johnny Does all the jobs he asked for his payment and the teacher laughed and said,You do know that Tuesday was April fools day right?
Little Johnny was finishing up his homework when the teacher gave him an assignment for the day. The instructions were simple: compare two objects, we will work on contrast next week
Little Johnny was walking down a dirt country road, and he came upon a old farmer leaning against a fence looking sad shaking his head. He walked up to the the old farmer and asked him what's wrong. The Old Farmer said, " my mule, he just won't do nothing, he don't work any more, always looking sad, barely eat, just sad." Little Johnny said, "can I go talk him?" "Sure, The Old Farmer said, he's back in the barn." Little Johnny went back in the barn, seen the mule just sad, and sighing.. A few minutes laters, Little Johnny came out and said, "You're mule fixed." The Old Farmer ran in, and seen the mule laughing, just rolling, and crying laughing.. "Thank you, thank you," The Old Farmer said, and Little Johnny was on his way.. Well, a few days later, Little Johnny was walking down the same old dirt road, and came upon The Old Farmer again, looking sad.. "What's the matter?" Little Johnny asked.. "It's my mule again, ever since you talked him he won't do nothing, he won't work, just laughing all day, what did you say?" "Can I go in and talk to him again?" Little Johnny asked. "Sure," said The Old Farmer, "he's back in the barn." Little Johnny went in the barn and a few minutes later came back out. "Your mule fixed sir." The Old Farmer went in seen the mule 'Crying' crying really hard. The Old Farmer came running out of the barn, "Hey boy! What did you say to my mule, one day he's sad, then laughing, now he's crying, just what did you say to my mule?" Little Johnny smiled and answered, "We'll the first time I told him my dick was bigger than his, this time I showed it to him"
