Lifestyle jokes
What does a stray cat/dog have in common?
Both of them don't have a home!
If two stoners get married, do they have joint assets?
I wish my grass was emo so it would cut itself.
What do you get when you cross between Tailga and emo?
Tailighmo.
What is an emo's most hated game? Hangman.
Because it's rubbing it in their face that they can't hang themselves.
What do you call a flat emo?
A cutting board.
Why did the nerd get scared of the emo? Because the nerd likes to leave the emo hanging.
Why do orphans like emos?
Reverse "emo" and put an "h" in the beginning.
How do emos fly? They hang themselves.
If I saw a homosexual or transsexual man do so much as TOUCH my child, he would be dead, zombified, and castrated by the end of the day.
Protect your young'uns from these degenerate freaks and live off the grid so they have no bearing on your life.
My Emo friend was coming over to my house. When he got there, he said, "Got a rope?" I asked why, and he said, "I want to make a swing."
Q: What do you call a gang of emos?
A: Suicide Squad.
When an emo asks you to hang out under a tree...
Why can't orphans go to a five-star hotel?
You know how divers jump off a cliff and land in the water well...
Emos do that too, but when they jump, they don't land in the water.
I asked the emo kid if they get jealous when their phone dies.
I don't see why people say emo kids never hangout.
People see this Rolex and they kill themselves.
Motherfucker, that's a suicide watch!
What do you call a flat emo?
Cutting board.
What's another nickname for a flat emo?
A copping boars.