What is the toughest thing about living a vegan life?
Getting up at 5am to milk the almonds.
What does Johnny Depp do when his kids are not home?
Cocaine.
I have a choking kink, so I will enjoy hanging.
What do you call an emo with curly hair?
Sam Reid.
Life lesson guys:
Remember, being healthy is basically dying as slowly as possible.
I posted up on my story that I got a new cut. My friends and family called the cops...
I used to be emo.
Why can't people in wheelchairs be gay? Cuz you can't be a fruit and a vegetable at the same time.
There was an emo kid in their room, boom, they're all gone, now.
Why are people surprised by Johnny Depp having $30,000 wine bills, domestic violence accusations, rampant substance abuse, poor hygiene, and the looks of a predator?
He grew up a Florida Man, after all.
How many innocent succulents have been brutally killed by people trying to cure their depression?
Therapy - Expensive - Years of hard work - Emotionally draining - Tough to find
Screaming in the woods - Free - Immediate relief - Scares hunters enough to leave, therefore saving innocent animals - Potential to make friends with people who are also screaming in the woods.
Who left him hanging?
Why was the emo jealous of the orange?
It came precut.
Met the emo kid today; he was pretty chill; he was just hanging out.
Hang in there, ya emo bastards! Remember, you could always be dead. Oh, too soon?
No wonder they wanna die so much. I'd wanna die too if I was a freak who listens to Black Veil Brides!
Anybody got a knife? I mean, an emo dildo?
What do you call a dude that is always high and gets higher than everyone else in the family? The alpha pothead!
There is gonna be a huge party at the orphanage tonight because the parents ain't home.
I am a God. Na, na, na, na, na, na. Yeah.
She's got makeup by the mirror in her bedroom, Thigh-high fishnets and some black boots, Nose pierced with the cigarette perfume, Half dead, but she still looks so cute. She is a monster in disguise, And she knows all the words to the trap songs, Takes pic's with a cherry-red lipstick, Says she only dates guys with a big..., mmm
You're so poor, you use the same toilet paper every time you take a poop!
Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn’t last as long for fat people.
