When you unplug the charger to charge your phone, but you realize it was plugged into your grandpa's life support:
Why can’t orphans fly? Because they’re still winging it.
Orphan
Me: You know your parents were very good people.
Orphan: Wow, I didn’t know that.
Me: I know, you're an orphan.
My life is like a grenade... I pull off the ring and, BOOM, it explodes!
The peanut gained confidence and finally came out of its shell.
Why do orphans like Monopoly?
To cry about the money they can’t earn in real life.
If I were a judge and gave you a sentence, I would sentence you to life for your looks.
What did the parents say to the orphans?
"YOU CAN'T SEE ME!"
Jack and Jill went up the hill to do it in the water.
Jack slipped, and the condom ripped; now they have a daughter.
Never kill an orphan, because then that will end their misery.
My best opinion: when life goes to hell, you just go down with it.
My doctor said I only have 1 year to live, so I killed him. Got sentenced to life in prison, problem solved!
my life but wait jokes actually have meaning
"Don't worry! Life goes on."
"Yeah, that's what's had me worried."
Me: Would you like to be the sun in my life?
Her: Awww... Yes!!!
Me: Good, then stay 92.96 million miles away from me.
Roses are red, life has no meaning, voices in my head, are constantly screaming.
Quote of the day:
A bad attitude is like a flat tire. You can't go anywhere until you change it.
Chao!!!
What does a relationship and suicide have in common?
I always fail on committing.
Hey guys! I'm back! Sorry I didn't post yesterday! I had swim practice, and a bunch of homework, but here I am! And here is the quote of the day!
"Push yourself, because no one will do it for you."
Love y'all so much!
