Not to brag, but I defeated our local chess champion in less than five moves.
Finally my high school karate lessons came to some use.
If you get a new bed, you have more bedroom, but less bedroom.
It’s true women do make less money than men.
But it’s their fault because they choose the lower paying jobs. Men, for example, choose the higher paying jobs like doctor or lawyer. Whereas women choose the lower paying jobs like women doctor and women lawyer.
Abortion clinics are kind of like NAZI gas chambers. Less people come out than go in.
Ur mom was so fat that even Jon Brower Minnoch was ten times less fat.
A cop pulls me over and asks if I have been drinking.
I'm an honest person and say yes, I did, so I take off my sunglasses and tell him that I now had 2 glasses less.
What do you call an orphan who became a priest? Father-less
The more suicidal people there are, the less suicidal people there are... Woah!
Suicide really isn't something to joke about, unless it's hanging yourself.
It's a really quicker way to die, and less blood spilled for your mother to clean up.
Less depresso, more espresso, I'm still depressed, but now I'm fast.
Child abortion is like tax evasion: the more you lose, the less problems you have.
1. Full name: John.
2. Proverb: work is not a rabbit, does not run.
3. Favorite meal: the sphinx with the sour cream.
4. Sexual orientation: sexually disorientated.
5. Mental health: mentally retarded.
6. Previous careers: funeral undertaking, after that two years in the circus as the main brown bear, after that in the church school for two years, after this experience five years as a screw in the jail for the worst criminals with the top degree of supervision and now working for the secret services in my home country after gaining the top-secret audit.
7. Favorite pets: dog, bumble bee named Maxo, a butterfly named Redwing and the lizard named Notail.
8. Favorite activities: washing the dishes, cutting the woods, vacuuming and playing hard rock.
9. Working motivation: none.
I hope that you will accept my curriculum vitae and that we will see each other soon already as new colleagues, I wish more or less. Kind regards, John.
There was once a young sister who never got anything good for her birthday, and she was sick of it. So one day the girl asked for a puppy, and the parents said yes. When she got the puppy, he was nice. But the puppy needed food every two minutes. The parents eventually the parents got sick of it and came up with a plan. Two weeks passed and the younger and less fat sister asked where her other sister was as she wanted to play barbies. “And also, why haven’t you been feeding the dog? He needs food you know.” The parents only answered with “oh! Yes, you can have a room all to yourself now. And about the puppy..he won’t need feeding for years.”
Your hairline's less straight than my dad's.
911 pilots are the best readers, They went through 30 stories in less than an hours
The more emos there are, the less emos there are.
What do you call an orphanage?
A parent-less shelter/homeless shelter.
White people be like less bomb Ukraines hospitals and schools!
Hahaha dumb white people!
Don't let mistakes drag you down. My dad made one mistake, but it ended up fulfilling the 5-year plan of heat energy generation in less than a millisecond.
Why did God create sex for marriage?
Because he wanted more people and less fun.
