I was making love to this girl, and she started crying. I said, “Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?” She said, “No, I hate myself now.”
– Rodney Dangerfield
Why are emo jokes so infamous?
Because they cut deep.
🗣: "Stop making suicide jokes!"
"Don't worry bro, I'll end it soon."
Guys, stop making jokes about blind people, they might s... never mind, continue.
What's a benefit of being an orphan?
No one makes yo mama jokes to you.
I asked my friend what the best gay joke is, and she said "You."
POV: I made a blind joke.
"That isn't funny. What if Helen Keller saw that?"
What does Joe Biden call a room full of kids? A toy room.
The wheelchair kid laughed at my test score, so I told him to stand up to the anthem.
I don't know an orphan joke, but I bib cried last night.
Because I am an orphan.
"Dees nutz, got 'em!"
I guess making 9/11 jokes at the airport is better than shouting "He's got a gun!" at the airport.
What's big, bounces, and makes little kids cry?
My donation to the orphanage :)
Me: Dark humor jokes are like a mother's love.
Orphan: How come?
Me: You wouldn't get it.
Orphan: . . . .
What do you call a person on fire in a wheelchair?
Hot wheels!
My biggest joke: I’d show you, but I don’t have a mirror to show you.
Famous last words: I COULD EAT THIS IN ONE BITE!
The quiet kid's dad dies. You go, "Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Not your dad."
Then he says, "What comes after 47?"
The quiet kid says, "AK."
The emo kid said, "I wanna die." But the quiet kid said, "Nah, I'm gonna die myself, bye!"
A bus full of nuns falls off a cliff and they all die. They arrive at the gates of heaven and meet St. Peter. St. Peter says to them, “Sisters, welcome to Heaven. In a moment I will let you all through the pearly gates, but before I may do that, I must ask each of you a single question.”
St. Peter turns to the first nun in the line and asks her, “Sister, have you ever touched a penis?” The Sister responds, “Well... there was this one time... that I kinda sorta... touched one with the tip of my pinky finger...” St. Peter says, “Alright Sister, now dip the tip of your pinky finger in the Holy Water, and you may be admitted.” and she did so.
St. Peter now turns to the second nun and says, “Sister, have you ever touched a penis?” “Well.... There was this one time... that I held one for a moment...” “Alright Sister, now just wash your hands in the Holy Water, and you may be admitted” and she does so.
Now at this, there is a noise, a jostling in the line. It seems that one nun is trying to cut in front of another! St. Peter sees this and asks the Nun, “Sister Susan, what is this? There is no rush!” Sister Susan responds, “Well if I’m going to have to gargle this stuff, I’d rather do it before Sister Mary sticks her ass in it!”
