Knock

Knock jokes

Documentary

When you're watching a 9/11 documentary, that one kid in your class finds the 97th Jenga block and knocks it down.

Nut

Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Dragon.

Dragon deez nuts.

Dragon deez nuts who?

DRAGON DEEZ NUTS ALL OVER YOUR FACE!

Peanut

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Peanut. Peanut who? Peanut butter open the door!

KGB

Knock knock.

Who's there?

The KGB.

The KGB wh-?

*slaps* I will ask the questions here.

Mum

I told my Mum, "Will you remember me in 6 minutes, 6 hours, 6 years?"

She said, "Yes."

"Knock knock."

I said, "My mum, who's there? You didn’t remember me!"

Cow

"Knock, knock?"

"Who's there?"

"Cow said."

"Cow said who?"

"Cow says moo you ding dong!"

Candy

Knock knock. Who's there? Oswald. Oswald who? Oswald my Halloween candy and now it's stuck in my throat!

Bar

Jim walks into a bar and asks for a shot of vodka. He then says to the barkeep, "Who's the toughest guy in here?"

The barkeep points to a man at the pool table. Jim then knocked him out and paid for the shot and left. He did this every Friday for 2 months. Finally, the barkeep is pissed because Jim keeps knocking out all of his customers. He then orders a gorilla and puts him in the bathroom.

Jim walks into the bar and gets another shot of vodka. He asks again, "Who's the toughest guy in here tonight?" The bartender points to the bathroom and says he's in there. Jim walks into the bathroom and everyone in the bar can hear yelling and screaming. The bartender asks, "What happened in there?" Jim smiles and says, "I don't know who that was, but when he wakes up tell him I put his fur jacket in the toilet."

Violence

Knock knock. Who's there? Knock knock. Knock knock who? I'll knock knock you out if you don't stop.

Boo

Pete: Knock, knock...

Paul: Who's there?

Pete: Boo...

Paul: Boo who?

Pete: Don't cry, it was only a joke!

Paul: I'm going to cry! It was such a bad joke!!!