Knock Jokes

Knock knock. Who's there? Oswald. Oswald who? Oswald my Halloween candy and now it's stuck in my throat!

I told this knock knock joke to Helen Keller...

Me: Knock Knock

Her:

When your little brother knocks your two Jenga towers you made with his toy airplane,

You: "Hey, stop trying to recreate the Twin Towers!"

"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Knock, knock." "Knock, knock who?" "Can you let me in now?"

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Knock, knock. "Who's there?" Not Sally.

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Cold.

Cold who?

"It is cold out here!"

Knock knock. Who is there?

I don't know.

Knock knock.

Who’s there?

My name is Ya.

Ya who?

Yahooooo!!!

When you're watching a 9/11 documentary, that one kid in your class finds the 97th Jenga block and knocks it down.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Johnny.

Johnny who?

Johnny want yo' mommy.

Knock knock.

Who's there?

The KGB.

The KGB wh-?

*slaps* I will ask the questions here.

Knock, knock!

Who's there?

Figs.

Figs who?

Fix the door, it's broken!

Knock knock. Who's there? Bear. Bear who? Bear bum!

Jim walks into a bar and asks for a shot of vodka. He then says to the barkeep, "Who's the toughest guy in here?"

The barkeep points to a man at the pool table. Jim then knocked him out and paid for the shot and left. He did this every Friday for 2 months. Finally, the barkeep is pissed because Jim keeps knocking out all of his customers. He then orders a gorilla and puts him in the bathroom.

Jim walks into the bar and gets another shot of vodka. He asks again, "Who's the toughest guy in here tonight?" The bartender points to the bathroom and says he's in there. Jim walks into the bathroom and everyone in the bar can hear yelling and screaming. The bartender asks, "What happened in there?" Jim smiles and says, "I don't know who that was, but when he wakes up tell him I put his fur jacket in the toilet."