Knock jokes
Knock knock!!
Who's there??
Dishwasher!!
Dishwasher who??
Dishwasher way i used to talk when i got my head kicked in!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Lettuce.
Lettuce who?
Lettuce out of school early!
My brother and I were roughhousing and accidentally knocked over our bookshelf. My mom came in and started asking who knocked it over, to which I replied that I only had my shelf to blame.
Hey, can I axe you a question?
My brother likes to build "traps" to capture our cat so he can pet it. I said it wasn't gonna catch anyone, he replied with "not going to stop who?" I told him not to worry that it could capture any two.
"Knock Knock"
"Who's there?"
"John."
"John who?"
John broke down into tears as his Mother's Alzheimer's had gotten progressively worse.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Alabama.
Alabama who?
Alabama your cousin.
Knock knock? Who's there? Kanga. Kanga who? Not kangawho, kangaroo!
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Hair.
Hair who?
Hairhairhairhairhairhair!
Prankster kid: Knock knock.
Neighbor: Who's there?
...
A drunk walks out of a bar late at night and sees a nun walking past on the footpath. He utters something hateful to himself as he begins running, building momentum before launching himself at the nun, catching her with a massive superman punch to the back of the head, knocking her tumbling brutally to the pavement.
He proceeded with a swift kicking to the nun's ribs and spine before grabbing the nun by the scruff of her habit and lifting her limp to her feet till face to face. Looking the nun dead in her eyes with menace, the drunk victoriously growled, "You're not so bloody tough tonight, are ya, Batman?"
"Knock, knock?"
"Who's there?"
"Cow said."
"Cow said who?"
"Cow says moo you ding dong!"
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Shhhhhhhhhh.
Shhhhhhhhhh who?
Shhhhhhhhhhampoo!
Knock knock. Who’s there? Gary. Gary who? Gary a torch.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Sally.
Sally who?
You're going to bed right now.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Rabid cow.
Rabid cow who?
Hold on, I need to get my gun...
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Fourth of April.
Fourth of April who?
May the fourth be with you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Gun. Gun who?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Rabid cow.
Rabid cow who?
Hold on, I need to get my gun....
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
My penis.
What did the man say when he knocked down the bookshelf?
Looks like I've only got myself to blame...
Sally jumped out a plane, she forgot her parachute!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not Sally...
How did she die?
A bomb came down whilst falling through the sky.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
A bomb.