Kind of jokes
Here's a list of puns, not all of them are mine.
1. Smaller babies may be delivered by stork, but the heavier ones need a crane.
2. Yesterday, I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I’m okay, but I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside.
3. My sister bet that I couldn’t build a car out of spaghetti. You should’ve seen her face when I drove pasta.
4. Getting the ability to fly would be so uplifting.
5. Two windmills are standing in a wind farm. One asks, “What’s your favorite kind of music?” The other says, “I’m a big metal fan.”
6. Why was the cookie sad? Because his mom was a wafer long!
7. Why didn’t the cat go to the vet? He was feline fine!
8. How do you make a good egg-roll? You push it down a hill!
9. That baseball player was such a bad sport. He stole third base and then just went home!
10. My parents said I can’t drink coffee anymore. Or else they’ll ground me!
What kind of veggie is always getting itself into a hard situation?
A pickle.
What kind of animal falls from the sky?
Answer: A raindeer.
What kind of instrument is always having to go potty?
A pee-ano/piano.
What kind of paper gets stuck to your foot?
DUH! A sticker.
what kind of shoes are made of banana peels? slippers.
Q. What kind of school does an ice cream man go to?
A. Sunday school!
Psst! Don't understand? Well, "Sunday" sounds like "Sundae." Get it now? Nope? Sorry. Plus, it's an ice cream homophone joke.
What kind of milk does a new age calf drink?
Dairy free.
What kind of cow has 2 legs?
YOUR MOM!!
What kind of bull doesn’t have horns?
A bullfrog!
What kind of star will come out in the daytime?
A starfish! 🐟🐠🐡🦐🦞🦀🦑🐙🦂
What is an angel's favorite kind of tortilla chip dip?
GuacaHOLY!
A: Guess what kind of men/women do gold diggers like?
Q: One that has a sense of money.
What kind of clothing should you wear on “hump day”? Camelflouge.
What kind of vacuum does an abortion center use? A: Dyson.
What kind of people love donuts in the morning? Cops, because they don't have anything else to do.
What kind of chair inhabits your soul?
A hair!
What kind of pillow makes sounds?
Trump goes to a bar and sees Hillary Clinton. He goes up to her and says, "Buy me a drink." She replies angrily, "Get your own drinks. What kind of a man asks a woman to buy him a drink?" Trump responds, "The kind that will grab you by the p***y."
How did they figure out what kind of shampoo Paul Walker used? They found his “head and shoulders” in the dash.