Kids jokes

I was such an ugly kid. When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up.

What is the best shield to use during a battle? The emo kid.

I saw a kid crying, so I asked them, "Where are your parents?" Then she cried harder, so I left the orphanage.

A depressed kid didn't succeed at suicide and said, "I'm a failure at suicide, too."

Dad: Ok kids, this selfie will just be me! *screen cracks*

If an apple and an emo kid fell out of a tree, which would hit the ground first?

The apple, because the rope caught the emo kid.

We are all just suicidal kids telling other kids not to do it.

So, a kid is taking a test, and the paper says, "In a pink bungalow, there's a pink fridge, a pink bed, a pink TV, and a pink cat. What color are the stairs?"

So the kid answers pink, like the idiot he is.

Bullying orphans is like bullying the homeless kid; both cry when you make fun of their parents.

Me: How does this thing work?

ForTnite kid: Oh, you don’t know how to use a pistol? Look, I’ll show you.

ForTnitekid: *shoots foot*

Me: That wasn’t a very good demonstration.

A kid had school today.

He was late every single day. He said in his mind, "I wish I can go to school again." What happened? It's obvious...... He died :)

How do you get the depressed kid out of the tree? You cut the rope.

Using pi, distract the fat kid next to you so you can copy his answers.

Why did Rolf Harris meet underage kids?

To tie his kangaroo down, sport!

Why did the emo kid get mad?

I wore a “Just Do It” shirt.

What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas? Gloves!

Nah, just kidding... He still hasn't unwrapped his present.

Why are Black women dating white men?

So their kids don’t have to worry about not meeting their father.

What do you call an emo kid with light-up shoes? A human chandelier.

When the school shooter says to get on the ground, but the sped kid thinks it's Simon Says!

Kid: Licks money.

Mom: Hey, don’t lick the money. It is dirty.

Kid: Is that why they call people filthy rich?