Kids jokes
What's the same about dark humor and kids with cancer?
They never get old.
Yo momma so fat, her four kids use her as a bed and her fat rolls as cozy blankets.
I have been charged, because I roasted a kid at a barbeque.
Roses are red, violets are blue, there are kids in my basement, you'll be there soon.
How many kids does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them. 😂😂😂😂
Me when my friend talks about a teacher blasting off on a kid
Q: How do you get the retard kid out of the tree?
A: Wave at him.
Why did the fire not burn the kid? Because it had no lips.
What do you call a bunch of autistic kids in a box?
A toolbox.
What game do emo kids hate the most?
Life.
how do u make a emo kid jump? a bridge.
I got suspended for telling the emo kid to hang in there.
What’s the difference between a Ferrari and ten 6-year-olds?
I don’t have a Ferrari in my garage.
Why can’t Santa have kids?
He only cums once a year.
For all those Simpsons fans out there, this one I'm sure you know:
Abe: "It's rotten being old. No one listens to you."
Lisa: "It's awful being a kid. No one listens to you."
Homer: "I'm a white male, aged 18-49. Everyone listens to me--no matter how dumb my suggestions are."
Kid: "THERE'S A SHOOTER IN THE BUILDING!"
Shooter: "Oops."
Yo, so poor that you wash your paper plates and cutlery in a kids' dishwasher.
So, a retarded kid's mom drops her kid off at school and says, "You better stop the bus today, because I’m not picking you up." So he agrees, and he arrives at the bus stop and says, "Stop!" (in a retarded voice). The bus goes straight past him. The next day, the mom says the same thing, and the kid goes to the bus stop and says, "Stop!" (in a retarded voice). The bus goes straight past him. The third day, his mom says, "I don’t care if I have to jump out in the middle of the road, you better stop that bus!" So the kid goes to the bus stop and jumps out in the middle of the road and says, "Stop!" The bus driver runs over him. A nearby lady stops the bus and says, "Why’d you run that poor kid over?" and he responds, "'Cause he was making fun of me" (in a retarded voice).
I got sent to the principal's office after telling the kid in the wheelchair to do a wheelie.
I threw a lamp at an emo kid and told him to lighten the f*ck up.
Me on my way to the principal's office after the trans kid told me to act my age, so I told him to act his gender.