I don't always like to tell dwarf jokes. But when I do, I like to keep them short.
I keep looking for my girlfriends killer but no one wants to do it.
What is the best way to keep dogs out of the street?
Put them in a barking lot!
Do you know how baby’s are made the boy puts his penuis in the girls butt and goes up and down for ten min then the girl takes a prego test and if it says no then you keep doing it tell she prego and the boy will lick the girl Down there 👇 and she will put his penuis in her mouth and suck it.Then he will spit on his hand and rub it on you’re her boobs and lick/suck them.
Who thinks I should keep bothring gwen? Comments good or bad!
If prostitution had a tax-exempt status, and if an adult bookstore had a tax-exempt status because of a glory hole, churches would have to do something else to keep their tax-exempt status to avoid the risk of going out of business.
So I was going out the door and I see me dwarf neighbour at the bus stop, I ask if he needs a lift. He replies with fu.. off. So I zip up my backpack and keep going to work
Kenya, if you keep smiling then you will become a positive bitchy! Tenya, everyone hates you why I have no idea! Kenya stop smiling and start dying! Tenya, why are you so mean! Kenya, stop acting like a mantrapp! Tenya, stop being a bitch in a skirt! Please leave a comment good or bad! cusswords whatever!
The waiter comes and asks you for the check. Instead I give him a 20 dollar bill and say "Boy you Can Keep It"
How much women does it take to change a lightbulb? All of them if you keep reloading
Hi guys I'm back and YES two jokes/blogs in one day. I KNOW. I just have nothing to do!!! So today I'm going to tell you how to get what you want from your parents!!! And there will be a joke at the end too. Enjoy! So The prank that I have for you guys today is, make sure you have glue, die, and a toothbrush that is not your's >:) So you are going to put the die in the glue and then put the glue on the toothbrush and give it to your sibling and say "here. I got your toothbrush ready for you" Then, make sure they take it. Once they take it, run so that they can not hit you once they taste it. Thanks for reading this prank today guys!!! I hope it works out for you and I can't wait to hear what happens with you guys in the comments below so make sure to comment and tell me what happened when you pulled this prank!! Sorry Prankster if this is offensive to you since you do pranks too. I will not do them anymore if you don't want me to :) Thanks for reading guys and here is that joke I told you about :)
Yo mama is so fat when she got in the car the wheels popped. So I know this was not the best joke and I can do better, but I will keep trying and see you guys next time! Bye!!! :)
Peyton: Okay guys no talking about dumb and stupid things that are not important. Ysabella: No!!! Peyton: Oh SHUT YOUR FACE THE HECK UP! Navaya: That makes no sense. Isaiah: I know right. Kenya: You don't tell us what to do you control freak. Ysabella: Shush. Kenya: BLAH! Peyton: Now we shall be watching some amazing things on You-tube, Subject math. aka BORING!!!! Andre: Say how old are you? Kenya: What? Andre: I'm asking her how old she is. Peyton: Thats none of your beeswax. Andre: Okay then. 9 hours later. Peyton: Okay class time for science!!! Kenya: Okay what are we doi... Peyton: SHUSH!!! Ysabella: shush. Peyton: We aren't doing anything but playing around with all this STUFF!!! heheheheehe. Navaya: No thanks. Peyton: Yes thanks! Mariah: Why? Oh for science. Peyton: Shut your mouth and watch me do this science work!!!
10 hours later. Peyton: What else? Ysabella: Will we can play games since thats all we have! Peyton: WHAT DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND BY Shuting YOUR MOUTH UPPPP!?!?!?! HMMMMMMMM? Ysabella: Sorry! Peyton: Then act like it! Kenya: Shush! Peyton: Shush! Andre: Shush. Shush! Mariah: Andre? Andre: Shush!
1 hour later. Peyton: Well we have a lot of E.L.A work to do. Ysabella: Sweetie this is Math and Science class! Not the other classes. Peyton mocking Ysa: Sweetie this is Math and Science class. Not the other classes. I know things! Andre: Then act like you know things. Kenya: True. Oliver: True that. Peyton: SHUT IT!!! Oliver: No! Geez.
2 hours later. clock time (7:00) Peyton: Whooohooo we got our E L A done now time for- Ysabella: I going to stop you right there! We have been working all morning from 5:00 a.m to this o clock a.m! Sooo KNOCK IT OFF!! Andre: Yes, thank you Ysabella you are now at the top of my friend list! Ysabella: What? Whatever! Peyton: Fine, go somwere else and whine about it cause I idc! Kingston: What does that mean, ohhhhhh. Peyton: Idc. Ysabe: IDC what does that mean? Kingston: "I don't care".
3 hours has passed now turned and it turned to 8:00 a.m. Peyton: What do guys want to do? Ysabella: Play games. Kingston: Draw! Andre: Go home! Peyton: Please. Well I'm picking so haha. Kenya: Here it says that we can pick the things we want to do it just can't be harmfull or bad for us! Oliver: Really it says that? Kenya: Yeah right here. Oliver: Noice. Peyton: Oh go play! Kenya: Good, byeeee! Oliver: Peace!
1 hour later. Ysabella: Woohoo, okay yes. Kingston: Whats going over there? Navaya: I don't know... oh she's playing a game! I think thats interland wow she is on level 78. super cool! Kingston: She on what? Navaya: Shush, shush, shush, shush! Kingston: RUDE!! Ysabella: Whoooohooooooooooooooo!!!! Navaya: Yeah go ysa! Kingston: What is she doing- Navaya: SHUSH!!!! Kingston: WhAtEvEr!!!!! Navaya: Oliver, Mariah, Kenya! Ysa just made it to level 89!!!! Yeeeeeee!! Oliver: Cool. Mariah: ?. Kenya:?
1 hour later. still 8:00. Ysabella: I'm on level 89,000,890. WOW!!!! Kenya: How? Kingston: MOVE!!! Kenya: OWWW!!! Kingston: Sorry Uh I did not mean to do that, are you okay? Kenya: What do you think? Navaya: Guys stop hugging, and get over here. Kenya: Gross! Kingston: Dude? Braylon: Guys shut up!! Kenya and Kingston: WE GOT IT!!! Ysabella: Your on level 90,890,9795, 4839,86903,6960,6 9506.996 WOOOOOOOOW!!! Kenya: Thats a lot of numbers!! Kingston: SuRe is!
2 hours later, 9:09 a.m, Peyton: Okay GUYS THATS ENOUGH GAMES FOR RIGHT NOW! Leilani: Why Ysa so close to her winning streak of reaching 900.138.902 milion billion points and levels on Interland!! Yeeeey.Peyton: Wow, great, cool, amazing!! Who CARES!!!! I KNOW I DON'T!!! Leilani: Yeah thats cause your heartless person! Who agrees? All the class raised their hands. Peyton: Blah! Leilani: WHATEVER! Peyton: Anyway the boss said that she wants us to do social studies. Who likes too I know I don't. 5 hours later 10:10 a.m, Peyton: Okay let's see I'm reading from the passage " The great plains experienced a drought from 1932 to 1939. This nat- Madison: The answer is dust bowl! Thats the answer... we did this in class and turned all our work in so yall know yeah, end of the story. Peyton: Will what about Kenya? Kenya: I did it. Mariah: We all did it! Andre: Did you do it? Peyton: Of course I did the social studies work! Duh I'm not an idiot. Andre: Well sure, thats what you think!
Peyton: Okay guys what shall it be for lunch? Any choices cause this is a one time thing no seconds. Raymond: Uh tacos. Kingston: Wrong! Pizza! Raymond: It's not Friday! Ysabella: Guys stop, this is a one time thing no second chances. They choose Pizza and Tacos. Kingston: Whateves. Raymond: No! Peyton: Okay fine I'll chose... and we will have Pizza and tacos with soda PLEASE and thanks. Raymond: Will thats not bad but I DON'T LIKE PIZZA!!! Navaya:Shut up raymond your going to ruin this for us!
1 hour later. Peyton: Okay guys, now lets get back to work!! NOW! Kenya: No, we already did our work! Peyton: Sure you did! Peyton rolls her eyes. Navaya: Did you do all your work Miss.Hickman? Hmmm. Ysabella: Yes, answer that question! Hehehehehe. Peyton: Heheh hell. Kingston: OOOOOOOOO you said the H word! Peyton: K so? Kenya: Here it states "No kids shall use bad words also known as profanity in the school halls and inside the classrooom". Kingston: Dang, wow! Kenya: Thanks!! 2 hours later. Peyton: Attention everyone! Attention! Janiah: What is it now! Kenya: Yeah. David: Yes Ms. Hickman? What, I have manners. Alexis: WHAT!? Peyton: Thanks for the loud attention! Okay thats the past now who wants to learn spanish? Janiah: Why? Not that thats a bad thing but why... WHY WOULD WE WANT TO LEARN SPANISH?! Kenya: Many reasons so we can began a big way to not having to go to spanish classes and other nonsense! Peyton: Sure that too and plus we're all bored right? Right!
56 mins later. Peyton: So how do you say Hello in spanish? Kingston. Kingston: Hola, duh everyone knows that! Oliver: I don't, so thanks King thanks! Peyton: How do you say "Hello, how are you" in spanish? Ysabella: Hola, como estas? Boom did it! I got an A! Kenya: Good job! Ysabella: Gracias. Peyton: Wow, way to show off. how do you... Kenya: How do you say "This is stupid" in spanish oh wait "Esto es estupido" trust me I looked it up!! Alexis: Wow!!! did you use translate? Kenya: Si
55 mins later. Peyton: How do you say "Everyone in here is acting like jerks and morons, they won't stop interrupting me and won't SHUT THEIR faces like I asked them too do multiple times" anyone? Nevaeh Daniels raised her hand, go on Nev! Nevaeh: Todos aquí están actuando como idiotas y Imbécil, no dejarán de interrumpirme y no CERRARÁN SUS caras como les pedí que lo hicieran varias veces? Peyton: Yes!!! But I meant that as a sarcastic type of way! Kenya: Okay freee time!!! Everyone cheers!!! To be continued.... This is about a 11 year old girl in charge in her classroom and spending the rest of the week with annoying classmates.
4 hours later. Kingston: Will we finally got away from that witch! Jaden: Thank you universe! Madison: Wait do you mean witch as in Peyton? Kingston: Yes! Kenya: Red lipstick, Red lipstick, Red lipstick! Kingston: Red lipstick? Mariah: Yes we chose red lipstick is that a ding dang problem?! Kingston: No ma'am. Kenya: Peyton, guys RED LIPSTICK!! Do I have to say it in spanish? Kingston: Guys Pey is on the way hurry...why? Cause she's looking for us DUMMY! Oliver: Okay ready. Geex. 1 hour later 7:00 p.m. Peyton in creepy way: Hey guys! Were are you! Kenya: Few more minutes! Ysabella: Peyton really has gone crazy!!! Kenya: Yeah shut up real quick! is it in position? Kingston: Sooooon. Kenya: Hury up you ding dang nitwit! Kingston: Blah! Kamrieiana: How is the dieinc? HOW ARE THEY?! Cornelese: There in place and don't spit in my face please. Kamrieiana: Sorry... HURRY UP MAN!!!! Jovani: HURRY Up DUDE!! Cornelese :O SHUT UP JOVANI!!!! Kenya: Hurry!!!
The next morning it was Tuesday, Peyton walked in the classroom feeling kind of mad at her classmates or co-workers. Peyton: Ugh! Stupid teachers!!!!! Leaving me in charge of the dumb class!!!! Jrks I mean JERKS!!!! Aniyah: O DANG It WHY THIS CLASSROOM!!!!!! Peyton: Blah! Aniyah: What? Peyton rolls her eyes at Aniyah. Aniyah: Keep rolling your eyes or they will get stuck up there!! Jarryd and Ethan walk in. Jarryd: O will hello Peyton! Ethan: Yes Hello.
2 mins ago. Kenya, Dijohn, Oliver, Osiris, Nevaeh, Mariah and Madison aka sisters came in. Kenya: Why this idiot? Oliver: Kenya that is mean but true at the same time. Osiris: Gotdang it I hate Peyton- Sometimes. Dijohn: I hate school and Pey too! Nevaeh: I like Pey she is nice. Kenya: Have you even met her?! Mariah: Hey guys listen I don't care about "Pey" I just came here to learn... Okay... now move Ken I got to work! Kenya: I don't blame you, excuse me!
4 minutes earlier. Dreylan, Janiah, Ji'Kyece, Laura, Braylon and Leilani both arrived TARDY. Dreylan: No, I prayed that she would not be here... PRAYED!!! Janiah: You prayed, I PRAYED 23 Times!! Ji'Kyece: Me, 45. Laura: Enough! Save that for if its really important! Braylon: And this is not Important!? Leilani: You guys are acting 2 year olds... 2 YEAR OLDS!!!! lets just find our seats... I mean come on, we did all of our work yesterday today will just be fun and games!! Laura: Yeah!!!
3 mins later. David, Ysabella, Kingston, Jazzlyn, Dylan,Tre'von and Jarod came in the classroom. David: Whyyyyyyyyyy! Ysabella: It should be time for Ms.Sumrall and Mrs.Lewis to get back from their stupid Teacher Trip! Kingston: Exactly! Jazzlyn: What are you guys so pissed off about? Dylan: oooooooo....oooooooo....ooooo!!! Tre'von: You said the P word! Jarod: Yeah We telln you momi! Ha...Ha...ha...ha...ha..ha...haeha! Jazzlen mama is goin to be so Mad! Jazzlen: Oh shut up witch face!!!!!!! 23 minutes later. Raymond,Y'uree, Elijah, Jessica and Bryson arrived TARDY As WELL As TARDY. Raymond: Nooooooooo! Y'uree: Yesssssss! Y'uree said yes in a sarcastic way. Jessica: whyyyy what did I do! Elijah: Man I hate School... HATE IT!!! Bryson: Wanna know who I do hate. Anthony and Peyton. Jessica: Because of that long pause thing? Bryson: Yesss, but thats not the point in this situwaytion! Raymond: True! Y'uree: True to that.
45 mins later. Peyton: Will class, hehe I sound so stupid right now but anyway we have 45 pages in our reading book to read, oh my bad... chapters! Anthony: Really? Bryson: She just said we have 45 chapters to read! Were you even listening?! Anthony: I was NOT TA- Peyton: Uh hmmm? Anthony: What...ever. Peyton: Okay guys enough of the mouth moving and more of the reading!!! Jessica: Will my book is tore in the middle section! Peyton: Gasp!!!! Fine I'll fix it! You big cry baby. Jessica: Thanks?
All the kids came in late about around 10:10 a.m. Kingston: Help! Navaya: Shush! Hey guys we're just reviewing things since you know were in "school", and Peyton is still in charge! Ysabella: Wait why is she in charge? David: Will in contrast Mrs.Lewis and Ms.Sumrall have not returned from their so-one calls it "Vacation" so they put Peyton in charge of us since their is no substitute! Janiah: That sounds soooo stupid! David: Will do you know a substitute? Janiah: No! David: Well then.
Kenya B. You
25 minutes ago. Jacob , Nariyah, Dallas, Isaiah ,Dylan , E'Mya, Kimbriel were LATE aswell as the TARDYS. Jacob: Dang to dang! Nariyah: Totally not funny peyt. not funny! Dallas: Yeah...yeah...yeah! Isaiah: Guys stop! Dylan: What now your on her SIDE? Traitor! E'mya: He has a point Isaiah! Kimbriel: Hahahahaahahahahahahhahahaahahahahahahahahahahaahah. sureeee doe. To be contienuded
Hello, I am Alan Shawn Feinstein. I would like to know who the owner of this website "worstjokesever.com" is. I am interested in buying this website. Please respond to me in the comments or email me. Thank you, and keep doing good things.
Why do special ED classes have fans? To keep the vegetables nice and fresh
Where do polar bears keep their money? In a snowbank!
Dad: Come on David go dress up like a girl
David: Isn't that illegal
Dad: Na it isn't illegal if you keep the buttons in
David: I hate my Life
keep smearing that make-up around your face maybe you'll get somewhere with it
when someone says to cheer up: you, I never thought of that. :)
-> in reality, :( (sob)
depression is no game, and here in this world, we are here for each other, although at times it might not seem like it.
Keep strong, and you'll find the end of the tunnel, but ending the pain and being gone just spreads depression.
When someone keeps talking while you are trying to focus on something, What is the rudest thing you can say to them?
SHIT- UP!!! ( shut up)
Son:Daddy? Dad: Why tf do you keep calling me daddy, Your 11 years old feminine gay hoe Son: Whoa!? Daddy whats that Dad: Wtf are you talking about? Son: Your dick has it goten more tastier? Son: Ooh... I..... Just.... Wanna.... Sssuuc Dad: ooh nope im not havin a gay hoe's feind in my house no quit lookin at my dick you need some pussy Son: eeeeeewwwwwwwwwww nooooo plz no plz Dad: Shut the fuck up: ehr em Mom: What the fugde is going on? Dad: Our sons a gay bitch Mom Launguage' so? i need to teach him how to like a girl huh? Dad: Yes Ma'am Plz Mom: Okay Mom: Herman Getch'er gay ass in my bed but naked i'll be there in 10 Son: wha whey huh ur gonna... wtf?!?!?!?? Mom: Quit cursing im gonna fuck u extra hard!! Son: Ewww imm gonna fuck my mom even though she is hot sexy but eeewwww Mom: Shut it!!!, or imma recordid and *fliped her hair taking off her panies(pussy naked)* And show this to ur gay fuck friends! Son: Huh Son: Mom FUCK U* Mom: Okay baby imma fuck u in a minute lemme tak my bra off Son:UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHH Son: moms are the worst are they? Me no there not sometimes but i love them teheheteheh
