Why can’t orphans go on field trips?
Because they need a parent’s signature.
Joke Jokes
I was gonna tell a baby joke, but I had to abort.
I think I gave you the coronavirus because I can't stop staring, a-choo!
What do you call a one-legged hippo?
A hoppo!
What do you call an Indian man stuck in a tree?
A leaf.
He: I am 60 and I have to slog 12 hours a day to make a living. Do you call it life?
She: I am 28 and still a virgin, do you call it life?
How did Helen Keller know she went to hell?
She didn't.
What animal can't you trust with your homework?
A: A cheetah!
Why can’t an orphan have a dog? It always runs away.
What’s the hardest part to eat on a vegetable?
The wheelchair.
I wish the grass in my back lawn was emo, because then it would cut itself.
What did Helen Keller do when she fell down a well?
Screamed till her hands fell off.
What do you call a toothless bear?
A gummy bear.
Did you hear the story about the eel? It was shocking! 😂😂😂😂😂
What did the store manager say when they ran out of toilet paper?
We’re wiped out!
Helicopters fly because they are so ugly that the ground pushes them away.
What do you call someone with no body and no nose?
Nobody knows.
What do you get when you cross a chicken and a horse?
An animal abuse warrant.
You wanna know why Stephen Hawking isn't going to heaven?
Because it's a stairway, not a ramp.
I dipped my hand in red food dye, so I said, "Looks like I’ve been caught red-handed!"
