Joke jokes
Why did the Drill Sergeant get in trouble?
He got caught playing with his Privates!
What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
A family portrait.
I got suspended at school today. I lit a kid's wheelchair on fire and called him "Hot Wheels."
What did one butt cheek say to the other?
"Together we can stop this shit."
Why did the dumb blonde pee inside the condom?
Because the doctor told the dumb blonde that the dumb blonde was going to get a urine test!
I saw a kid sitting on the curb and I asked him, "Are you an orphan?"
He said, "Yeah, what gave me away?" "You're parents did."
Why does everyone respect midgets and dwarves?
They never look down on anyone.
"Knock, knock."
"Who's there?"
"Who."
"Who who?"
"Why are you who-ing like an owl?"
Cheese, gimme cheese!
(inspired by a friend)
My friend said they were going to make a comeback. I told them to do it at the back of the throat.
"Do you know the difference between wallpaper and toilet paper?" Replies, "No." "Gross!"
Women be like don't tell me what to wear, proceeds to tell men what to wear.
What do you call California during a forest fire?
Completely normal.
Women be like, "Equal rights, equal pay," then decide that they don't want to do labor intensive jobs.
POV: You're an orphan.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not your mom.
What do you call an orphan's parents?
Dead meat.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not your parents.
What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, because they are walls.
What do you call Yakub with no eyes?
No eyes Yakub.
For orphans, every bag of chips is family sized.