Joke jokes
Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a few hours.
Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
Teacher: Why do people snore?
Me: Because they sleep.
When you say to your friend, "I've got your back," then at his funeral you see in his coffin he's missing his middle piece.
Teacher: What month is it?
Quiet kid: AUG-ust.
Classroom: Visible concern.
What’s a Cannibal’s Favorite Food?
Ra-men.
Why can’t orphans play baseball? Because they can’t find the first base they came from.
Kid: Licks money.
Mom: Hey, don’t lick the money. It is dirty.
Kid: Is that why they call people filthy rich?
What does the bee say to the fly?
"Buzz off!"
I drew a fist on a body, and then I drew a guy saying to him, "That dude's a knucklehead!"
What did the tree wear to the pool party 🥳?
Swimming trunks.
Why did the pillow go to court?
Because it had a pillowcase!
How do you get two deaf people from fighting?
Turn off the lights and walk out.
What is the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a Harley Davidson?
The location of the Dirtbag.
I have a really good construction joke, but I’ll have to post it later because I’m still working on it.
Why did the cookie go to the hospital?
Because it felt crummy.
I heard a joke about chocolate.
It wasn’t that funny.
I just Snicker-ed.
Why did the skunk cross the road?
To get to the odor side!
Yo mama is like train tracks; she gets laid all around the country.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
He drove too far away from the power point/modem.
Actor 1: "I'm Michael with a b and I hate insects."
Actor 2: "Where's the b?"
Actor 1: "THERE'S A BEE???????????!!!!!!!!!!!????????!!!!!"