Joke jokes
What can you say to make a rape victim feel better?
"It will be over soon."
An emo girl walks up to a tree to give it a high five... the tree left her hanging.
What's red and green and goes 100 miles per hour? A frog in a blender.
How do you make 7 an even number? Take the "s" out!
Rules of Dark humor:
1. All subject matter can be used, nothing is off limits.
2. No saying "Me" or "My Life" as a joke. Nobody finds those funny. We want actual good and meaningful jokes.
3. Don't Repeat Previously Posted Jokes. If you are saying the same joke that the person right before you posted you are just begging for attention and nobody by any means likes that.
I will add more in the future and be frequent on this site.
- Sincerely, Zane
What happens when an asian with an erection bumps into a wall? he breaks his nose
Call me Willma, will my balls fit ya mouth?
What did the skeleton say before dinner? "Bone appetit." His whole family found that humerus.
I would roast you, but your mirror does it every time you look into it.
If a special ed kid is late to class, is it okay to call me a little tardy?
What's green then red all over and goes 100mph?
A frog in a blender.
What's worse than five dead babies in one garbage can?
- One dead baby in five garbage cans.
What is the difference between a Catholic priest and acne? -- Acne comes on your face after you turn 13.
Why is Stephen Hawking a bad role model? -- He doesn't stand for anything.
My mother wanted to test my responsibility and wanted me to cook dinner for the family to help me understand how it feels to constantly cook for a whole family. So, me with my horrible humor, decided to make a giant joke for when dinner time came around, and so I just got four plates and set them in front of my family and I then said, "Here you are, a fine African meal." Then everybody looked at me in disappointment, and then I continued to say, "What? Poor taste?"
How do you get a man with only one arm out of a tree?
Wave.
What did Chris Brown say when he saw Rihanna?
"I'd hit that."
My son asked me what dark humor was, so I told him, "see that kid in the wheelchair, ask him to stand." He said, "But Dad I'm blind." Exactly.
What's worse than locking your keys in the car in front of an abortion clinic?
Having to go back inside and ask to borrow a hanger.
What’s Bin Laden’s favorite drink? Double Manhattan.