Joke jokes
What does an apple and suicidal person have in common?
They're both hanging from a tree.
My name is Ethan, and I don't find this funny.
Do you know Imagine Dragons? Imagine dragon these nuts across your face!
What do you call a disabled person who gets high?
Baked potato.
What is the difference between a condom and an orphan?
One of them is used.
The other day, I walked up to someone who looked lost and he had all scraggy clothes on. I said, "Are you an orphan?"
He said, "Yeah, what gave me away?"
I said, "Your parents, buddy."
Yo, hairline been missing so badly that the police had to put up a wanted poster for it!
I know what you did with your mom last night, the orphan. Nah, jit trippin', you thought I had one?
What’s the difference between an orphan and cotton? One gets picked.
Welcome to Arby's, where your babies become our gravy!
What does the handicapped man say to the cops when he’s mistaken for a criminal: "Don't shoot, I'm unarmed!"
I hope Stephen Hawking's an organ donor because I need new parts for my go-cart.
What do you call a person with no arms?
Armless.
No, it's harmless.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home, LOL.
It is reported that when Churchill met Stalin at Yalta, they discussed their hobbies.
Churchill said: "I collect the jokes people tell me about me."
"That's a coincidence," said Stalin, "I collect the people who tell jokes about me."
What's got 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet? The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas? Gloves! Nah, just kidding... He still hasn't unwrapped his present.
Do you like pudding? Pudding deez nuts in your mouth!
Wanna hear a joke about the Flash?
"Never mind, it's too fast."
Grandpa: "Sonny, let me tell you something. There's only one damn thing in this whole world worse than Alzheimer's."
Boy: "What's that?"
Grandpa: "What's what?"
What do you call a cow in the snow?
Chilli Beef.