Joke jokes

What's the difference between a blonde and your computer?

You don't want your computer to go down on you.

That moment when you realize you do not have a joke and someone ends up laughing at what you still wrote anyway.

What did the boy say to the noose?

"Can you please tie me."

Two people walk down the road. One says to the other, "Mitch, we passed Weight Watchers 2 minutes ago." He responds, "Jake, the noodle shop is just here. You've been carrying that sh*t on your head for 14 years!"

The boy ran into the gym, why?

Because he wanted to ketch-up with everyone. Also, he got pun-ishment from his "momster."

What did the cow say to the prostitute?

Moo.

A pregnant woman enters the hospital with her concerned husband. As she goes into labor, a group of doctors asked him if he would like to try a device that transfers your spouse's pain to the father's nervous system.

He agrees and the doctors turn the dial on the device to 10%. Strangely, the man felt little pain. They continued to adjust the dial until it stopped at 100%, yet the man felt nothing. Later on, the wife had delivered the baby and the pair left the hospital with a healthy baby only to find the milkman laying on their stairs with a puddle of blood around his head, shaking uncontrollably.

Why did the Indian man eat a cow? Because he wanted to be fat.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Joe Mama!

What do you call a kid in a hot tub?

Vegetable soup.

This isn’t a joke, but my name [is] Mr. Cheese.

Orphan joke protest! If you think orphan jokes are bad and wrong, then comment good comments; if not, then just comment! Let's reach 67,000 good comments!

Hey Hunter, Thomas here.

Why did the plane cross the road?

To get to the other side.

Thanks guys, remember to like it, means a lot!

What’s yellow and can’t swim? A school bus.

I call my sister a "fat cow," and she asks me, "Want to hear a joke?" I say, "Sure." She says, "You are the joke!"

Knock knock. Who's there? Bad joke.

What's the difference between a fish and a guitar?

You can tuna guitar, but you can't tuna fish!

I guess this is pretty plane.

I am sorry I am just winging it.

Wow, I guess these jokes haven't taken off.

Wow, I just landed that one!

I was going to write a joke about my penis, but it was too lång and overused.

What do you call a bad bull?

A bully.