Teacher: Describe a penguin.
Student: Black, white, beak.
Teacher: Good, now describe an orphan.
Student: Sad, maybe depressed, no family.
Teacher: Amazing, now describe a cow.
Student: Brown bun hair, red shirt, white skirt, pantyhose, and dollar tree shoes.
Teacher: No! How does that describe a cow?
Student: It describes you tho.
What makes a skeleton laugh?
When you tickle his funny bone with a skele-TON of jokes!
Heh.
What did one tree say to another in a crisis? Don't leaf me when things get bad.
Ah yes, cremation. My last chance of having a smokin' hot body.
What do you call a person with no body and no nose? "Nobody knows."
Time for double joke Tuesday.
What is a bird's favorite letter?
A C gull.
So I won a round of CSGO with my team, then on VC, some kid trash talked me.
Kid: You're a dick, you know!
Me: And you're a pussy, you know?
What do you call a person who wants to be punched a lot?
A clout chaser.
Search up "clout meaning" if you don't get it.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Chicken.
What is the difference between shroud and a shroud imposter?
Shroud uses reddit, and the imposter uses WJE.
Reddit king and q, I really dgaf what you say, you guys are practically obsessed with me cuz ur leaving hate comments on almost all my jokes, so stop. You're obviously gonna look bad if you just insult meh jokes.
If you guys dont like my jokes, you can just dislike and not leave a comment, ok?
What do you call a foot that got beaten at everything?
De-feeted (Defeated)
*sans*: Why was the skeleton depressed? Because Frisk keeps resetting and it resets when he lost his phone.
August 2020: LeafyIsHere gets terminated on Youtube for harassing Pokimane.
Billy, a toxic kid in Leafy's fanbase: "Imane's life is a joke, that's why I call her Jokeimane."
A person who simps for Pokimane: "And you look like you came from a farm, Hillbilly."
If Jeffy goes to an orphanage, he will die. How is he supposed to move?
Time for a Terraria joke.
What is a worm called when it is with a rich worm for his money?
A gold digger.
(play the game or watch some vids to understand)
It's not surprising there isn't a whole lot of good tree jokes.
Most foresters have a wooden personality.
Just.
Old.
Killer.
Epigrams.
Some dude called me a tool.
So later I got hammered and nailed his girlfriend.
Guess he was right :/
I'm doing a new thing where you say an object in the comments, and I will try to make a joke based off the object.
If you are interested, you can submit an object in the comments.
I will give the person credit each joke I do.
Me: "You wanna see my dad?"
Some kid: "Yeah?"
Me: "Close your eyes and he will appear."
Some kid: "He ain't appearing."
Me: "Sorry I thought he would appear for you. He won't appear for me."
*The kid laughs*
Moral: Not everything is supposed to be funny text if you notice what was really going on. 🙃
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because these jokes are not funny.
Here's why the chicken crossed the road...
The chicken was on the run from a crazy-ass butcher ready to murder the poor thing, so the chicken crossed the road. The chicken was crossing the road, then a blind kid saw the chicken, and the kid was hit by a flying rock, his vision was blurred (what vision?) and was actually cured of the blind. The chicken ran and jumped into a truck's opening and was never seen again... The kid got up from the ground and looked at the road, to see the chicken was not there, and said..." The chicken crossed the road...." The kid yelled at everyone about the chicken crossing the road and got a lot of positive attention. Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Reddit were full of the chicken nonsense and gained widespread attention from N.A to Asia in only 1 day.
The butcher was arrested for the attempted murder of a joke animal and was sentenced to over 20 years in solitary confinement, and a few weeks later, the sentence was moved to a life sentence, and the butcher became known as The ChicKiller.
The End (hope you enjoyed, I was bored so I made this shit...)
